i should have seen it long coming. i mean, i noticed for three years already.
megat is right. i don't belong here. though he forgot to include himself in the reason why. i'm just so fucking naive to actually think they want me around because they see me as their friend. even mimi is starting to ignore me.
he gave me a long lecture the other day about this and said that he'll be there to help me. i'm stupid to even believe him. he's right about the rest of the stuff just not about the being there thing. now, everyone's leaving me behind, accusing me of things i didn't do or something i did for their own sakes.
i'm so fucking tired of taking care of everyone's hearts.
they use me for every fucking reason and i complied.. after that they left me to the gutters, thinking i was a nuisance and blame me for every single fucking wrong thing that happened in their lives. and they have to put me down, try to get in my head that i'm not good enough. i'm always not good enough.
it doesn't bother me anymore. mind over matter.
what more do you want from me? do you want me to jump over a train for you? polish your shoes? fix you broken relationships?
what fucking more?
i never thought i would say this but now i don't fucking care what you think about me.
next year, i'm going to try and start new. if they still wanna fuck around with me, i don't care. i'll go. that's what you guys want anyway right?
i'm that backstabbing bitch who likes to mess with everyone's lives, that crazy wannabe, that naive let-people-step-over-her kind of girl. right?
jenny:
I am jafreen natassia iman from Earth and is born on
01/12/93, 0100 hours.I'm so unpredictable, I am totally an element that you'd never
ever known, you can;t find it in the periodic table cause no one has even found it- I explode in
your face just like potassium when it touches water, it's really explosive, you should really run
away first before I do spark into flames and burn you alive! I love blasting my music as well,
i'm like addicted to it like drugs.and i'm uncertain of my aspirations. where do you go to know what you're made for?
and god, my total failing is my insecurity and no sense of self-assertiveness. seriously, i SUCK.
this homo-sapien specimen was given a very long&unflattering name on the first of december of 1993.
she hails from the venus clan and was borned under the shining archer, Sagittarius.
being indescribable (hmph!), she loves reading long&boring texts that eludes other normal human beings,
gazing at the beautiful moon&stars from her balcony, listening to screamo&slow songs,
singing offkey and boring everyone to death (you can decipher that literally or figuratively, XP)
she's currently inbetween worlds after going through sixteen years on earth, mostly physically unscathed
but emotionally scarred. her heart was stolen on the twenty first of may by Elisha b. Kamal Basha
but somehow she hasn't alerted the authorities. ;) values her friends highly as they are the
light to shine through her darkness. loves writing stories and abandoning it halfway through. (warning. :p)
and god, she's like a damn klutz that if you gave her a button to judgment day and asked her to take care of it,
she would accidentally press it instead. she could cause the end of the world! XP and she loves to say these stupid things
right from her head. been seen singing and dancing in the rain. believes in kismet.
hello once again, i have been having nightmares. and my sanctuary of star filled skies
and soft flower fields are currently being invaded by aliens and bugs with hailstorms coming in.
inspire me, impress me, embolden me, make me smile. :) i love questioning stuff, i guess i'm those weird people
who can't shut up. and i totally envy people with red hair, don't ask, it's this weird thing
but i won't come up and stare at you just cause' of your hair, god i'm not a stalker.
haha, and i love to laugh out loud, seriously. even when i'm depressive.
though i've been putting on this fake smile for so long, i don't know how i feel right now.
see? even talking/ typing i sound like a lunatic. XP
i'm not sure what to do with my life or this stupid profile at the mo'.
maybe i should give my muses on Olympus a swift kick in their togas to get my brain moving again.
i should have seen it long coming. i mean, i noticed for three years already.
megat is right. i don't belong here. though he forgot to include himself in the reason why. i'm just so fucking naive to actually think they want me around because they see me as their friend. even mimi is starting to ignore me.
he gave me a long lecture the other day about this and said that he'll be there to help me. i'm stupid to even believe him. he's right about the rest of the stuff just not about the being there thing. now, everyone's leaving me behind, accusing me of things i didn't do or something i did for their own sakes.
i'm so fucking tired of taking care of everyone's hearts.
they use me for every fucking reason and i complied.. after that they left me to the gutters, thinking i was a nuisance and blame me for every single fucking wrong thing that happened in their lives. and they have to put me down, try to get in my head that i'm not good enough. i'm always not good enough.
it doesn't bother me anymore. mind over matter.
what more do you want from me? do you want me to jump over a train for you? polish your shoes? fix you broken relationships?
what fucking more?
i never thought i would say this but now i don't fucking care what you think about me.
next year, i'm going to try and start new. if they still wanna fuck around with me, i don't care. i'll go. that's what you guys want anyway right?
i'm that backstabbing bitch who likes to mess with everyone's lives, that crazy wannabe, that naive let-people-step-over-her kind of girl. right?
