a girl.

movie galore

2009-09-03T00:08:00.000-07:00

cause everytime we touch i get this feeling ♥

2009-08-27T16:47:00.000-07:00

so i've got this new Tumblr. account and it's awesome!
in fact i actually considered deleting my deaar bloggy and just continue using Tumblr. but no effing way, too many memories stored in my baby. ;)
newayz, just a quick update.
i gotta go to Kelantan in a few minutes.
:)
buh bye!

stripy stripes and polka, polka dots

2009-08-24T08:47:00.000-07:00

i knew that deep down inside, i'm still a girly girl who loves window shopping. ;)

shopping wishlist:

god, i wish that i was rich
(and that sounds so superficial and selfish right now)
but i can't help myself.

credits to : lookbook.nu and modcloth.com

2009-08-15T06:39:00.000-07:00

im disappearing for a couple of months i think.
i need to go on this path of self discovery for a while.
i feel like i'm disintegrating underneath this load.
i'm surrendering to this mean world, retreating within myself.

i feel like dying.

23rd July 2009

2009-07-23T00:06:00.001-07:00

my life's so fucked up.

surprise surprise, witty sarcastic retorts, gaining appetite, fake smiles and bitchy attitude's back.

did you miss her?

the bitch's in town and guess what, she's so indifferent,

she doesn't care what you do to her anymore.

she's devoid of any feelings or emotions.

scream at me, slap me,

use me like you would use a disposable diaper; shit on me then throw me in the dustbin.

one day of physics to go and i'm free to die in failure.

i think people hate me. don't they?

life is but a dream, this too shall pass.

not.

i have a thousand and one things to say but somehow i can't find the words.

i need to get out of here.

ripped her heart out right before her eyes

2009-07-14T06:40:00.000-07:00

this video is awesome.

2009-07-13T06:08:00.001-07:00

I’ve been praised a thousand times for my positive outlook and my positive contributions to music. And I’ve celebrated loudly and advertised myself as someone with an attitude of gratitude. But all it seems to take is one small moment of negativity, inadequacy, or fear, to break me from my most powerful nature, that of being the possibility of real love. So the failure I would create in THAT would reduce me again to feeling like just a worthless soul whose life will be over before it began so what’s the point in even trying.
-www.freshnessfactorfivethousand.blogspot.com, Jason Mraz

i can relate with that.

evanesce from this world honey

2009-07-12T08:54:00.000-07:00

recurring nightmares,

i don't know what to do, my mind's a muddle. a puddle of fragments of thoughts and old memories, old stories, old scars, old wounds threatening to open up again.

i hate this.

all.

every fucking memory of my fucking stupid hurtful past life, why did they have to come up in such simple random events lately? and they're not even significant but they felt like a trigger for the flow to just come bursting out in the open.

after so many fights i don't know how to handle it anymore.

one can only be strong for so long.

this war emotionally inside of me. hmm, i'm on the losing side.

i think i'm losing my mind.

war

2009-07-10T16:00:00.000-07:00

just had another nightmare.
the third time this week.

hmm.

MJ

2009-07-02T04:29:00.000-07:00

MICHAEL JACKSON

you are not alone

“In a world filled with hate, we must still dare to hope. In a world filled with anger, we must still dare to comfort. In a world filled with despair, we must still dare to dream. And in a world filled with distrust, we must still dare to believe.”

"Music has been my outlet, my gift to all of the lovers in this world. Through it, my music, I know I will live forever,"

"Heal the world, make it a better place, For you and for me and the entire human race, There are people dying but if you care enough for the living, Make a better place for you and for me."

blind by lifehouse

2009-06-30T00:41:00.000-07:00

NurSyawalinaAzwaniHussein:
you were born to make me appreciate the good things in life

FarahAmiraAmirHamzah:
you were born to be my muse through boredom

KarinFam:
you were born to make me hyper beyond saving

ElishaKamalBasha<3
you were born to make my heart beat faster

RazninaAlyshaRadzlan:
you were born to help me discover a side of myself that i didn't know

ZaidatulAzreenZulkiple:
you were born to make me suffer and to be there for me

NurulBashirahGhazali:
you were born to help me overcome my daily confusion and to make me hysterical

StefiraMarzuki:
you were born to give sarcasm and laughter to a whole new dimension for me

SitiNurBalqisTuah:
you were born to be an older sister to all of us

TengkuMutiaraTiara:
you were born to always stick up for me and to make me crazy and horny

RazlizaAzreenRadzlan:
you were born to be my trustworthy secretkeeper

SitiNurBaizuraTuah:
you were born to be my gossiping machine

AisyahMunirahAbdulRahman:
you were born to be the person to go to when i'm happy or in distress

MuhdDzakirin:
you were born to be the best brother ever and to help me through everything

MegatZaimSyamim:
you were born to be the person to wake me up

AlifAffandi:
you were born to be the big brother i never had

AriefMirkael:
you were born to be a person i could count on

KhalisKhalini:
you were born to be understanding and always empathize for me

AhmadAbdulAziz:
you were born to always support me no matter what

MuhdIlman:
you were born to make me roll on the floor laughing

MrSunshine:
you were born to help me through my ups and downs and to be my personal philosopher

MuhdNasharuddin:
you were born to beat me at bowling and succeed

FikriHazrith:
you were born to be my personal advisor

I LOVE YOU GUYS TO BITS. <3
(just sharing the love after having an epiphany in school)

epiphany: a sudden, intuitive perception of or insight into the reality or essential meaning
of something, usually initiated by some simple, homely, or commonplace occurrence or experience.

the way you make me feel.

2009-06-27T05:54:00.000-07:00

taken from my auntie's tumblr. :)
www.graymare.tumblr.com

Sagittarius. =)

A Sagittarius woman lacks tact and her flat, on-the-face statements may make you feeling like running away from her. Then, suddenly, she will say something so charming that you will feel as if you are on the seventh heaven. There, you go again! You will be trapped in her charm once more. Once you have been enamored by a Sagittarius girl, you will be staying with her for a long time. She is pleasant, friendly, outspoken and very talkative. Her forthrightness comes form the fact that she has no illusions about the world.

She sees it exactly as it is and says what she sees. At times, you may wish that she were not so honest. But then, she would be like any other girl, wouldn’t she? In all probability, you will not like it. A Sagittarian female is very optimistic, but she is not irrational. She will judge the entire situation as per the facts, analyze its probable outcome and still believe that things will get better. Usually, she is very calm and composed. However, when you become rude to her or offend her, she may become like the fire-spitting dragon.

Sagittarius women are quite independent and love their freedom. They are attached to their family, but not too much. If you want to get something done from a Sagittarian female, just ask her; don’t order. She will never ever do it. She is your better half and don’t you dare forget that. On the other hand, she doesn’t want a sissy for a husband or boyfriend. He has to be a real man, who has his ego and won’t stand for nonsense. So, you will be expected to balance politeness with firmness.

I know it’s difficult - but then, since when was winning someone easy. With a Sagittarius girl, you will never have to guess. She says what she thinks and how she acts shows what she feels. This bluntness may cost her heavily at times, even to the point of ending the relationship. Still, she would act as if she’s not hurt at all and it is just one of the many harmless flirtations she’s had. People will even believe all this, while inside she will be weeping and nursing her wounds. All this time, she will be analyzing what went wrong and when.

The word ‘marriage’ makes a Sagittarian female a little nervous and you will need to tempt her in order to make her settle down. She is a little hard to catch and tends to be one of the boys all the time. That doesn’t mean she looks or acts like a man! Infact, she is as female as any other girl is. The society and its norms do not matter to her. She can never be the hypocrite that some people are and tend to wiggle a few tongues. Her honesty and brusqueness further add to the negative opinions.

Don’t be fooled by them. Look deep inside a Sagittarius female and you will find a woman who is so enthusiastic about life and who trusts easily. Infact, this extreme belief makes her heart vulnerable and defenseless. It gets broken too often, but then, she knows how to move on with life. You will be tempted to care for her. It’s natural. There are hardly any people who can resist the bright and charming disposition of a Sagittarius girl. She will not be too good with money and will most probably be on the extravagant side.

She is very sentimental and emotional, though it seems otherwise. It just that, where her feelings are concerned, she becomes too shy. After marriage, your house will always remain sparkling clean, even if you don’t have a maid to do that. She cannot stand sloppiness, it doesn’t appeal to her sensibilities. She may not be too good at cooking, but she will also not burn your egg every day. A Sagittarian girl may pass the most sarcastic comments when she is angry, but she will forget the resentment soon enough. Then, she won’t understand why are you so upset.

As a mother, she will be very friendly with the kids. Infact, she will be more of a chum, than a mom. Only, you will have to teach them to take her bluntness with a pinch of salt. Apart from that, she will be wonderful and make them as independent as she is. She will be a lovely hostess to guests and make them feel at home. Just let her be what she is. Don’t try to change her and don’t curb her individuality. She will brighten your life with her optimism, boost you with loyalty, trust you blindly and shower her affection on you. She will encourage you to see dreams and help you in making them come true!

you rock my world

2009-06-26T08:06:00.000-07:00

RIP
Michael Jackson
you'll always be remembered :)
soundtrack of my childhood.
Beat It, Remember the Time,
Smooth Criminal, Thriller, Liberian Girl, Black or White, Billie Jean,
You Rock My World, The Way You Make Me Feel, Don't Stop Till You Get Enough,
They Don't Care About Us, Ghosts, Scream and Bad. :DD

let us all walk on the moon.

he called me beautiful.

2009-06-23T03:20:00.000-07:00

Jaf Reen Natassia Iman bt. Jaf Faizal,
what have you done babe, who are you? You're in way over your head girl. What happened to your dreams? What happened to your aspirations? What happened to your hopes? You've become the very thing you swore not to be, the very thing you hate. This stupid, selfish, ignorant, superficial girl I see in the mirror is not the Iman I know. You need to get your priorities straight, get your life back on track. Or you would be plummeted to the ground, hard.
Change your attitude, Iman, that's the first step.

I miss the old you. What happened to her?

faux pas

2009-06-22T05:23:00.001-07:00

stupid stupid me.
stupid stupid faux pas.
stupid stupid hormones.
stupid stupid school.
stupid stupid brain.
stupid stupid fairytales.
stupid stupid hope.
stupid stupid rumours.
stupid stupid indifference.
stupid stupid conspiracy.
stupid stupid temper.
stupid stupid phone.
stupid stupid epidemic.
stupid stupid myspace.
stupid stupid love songs.
stupid stupid fakers.
stupid stupid homework.
stupid stupid POVs.
stupid stupid abandoners.
stupid stupid bitches and mofos.
stupid stupid mind.
stupid stupid offence.
stupid stupid sensitivity.

i'm drowning in my own stupidity.

and we'll fight and we'll fight and we'll fight.

2009-06-19T17:26:00.000-07:00

I stood by you
I didn't have to
And if I knew
I'd go away

I'm not like you
I dont backstab
My dear you should be better than that

Sorry if I never call like you did
And you know, you know
You dont really have to
I try to come around come around you
All you really gave, you really gave back was hatred

I gave you my all back then
Whenever you needed me
Your lies they cut through my skin whenever I reach
For you, for you, for you..

I'm not like you
I dont backstab
My dear you should be my best friend

Sorry if I never call like you did
And you know, you know
You dont really have to
I try to come around come around you
All you really gave, you really gave back was hatred

I gave you my all back then
Whenever you needed me
Your lies they cut through my skin whenever I reach
For you, for you, for you..

And anything for you my friend

-I'm Not Like You by Yunalis

you have this way,

of making me smile with my tears,

of making me laugh when i'm down,

of making me fall for you when i'm trying not to.

_______________________________________________

Oh blue sands, can you tell me if I ever be happy?
Oh blue sands, can I stay here forever?
Oh blue sands, can you make them all go away?
Oh blue sands, what are you doing in my hair?

And everything will get better if I stay for a while
And we’ll find another way to be happy one day
And everything will get better if you hold on for a while
And the sea come and sweeps us away from here

Oh blue sands, will I ever get to marry my handsome friend?
Oh blue sands, can you make them understand?

Oh blue sands, I don’t want to go up there and pretend
I’m okay

I don’t hate you anymore
I don’t hate you anymore
I don’t hate you anymore
I don’t hate you anymore

I don’t hate you anymore for the way you remind me of the person I cannot be
For the things I cannot have
I don’t hate you anymore when I look at you
All I see is the blue waves coming to get me and take me away

I don’t hate you anymore for the way you remind me of the things I cannot have

Oh blue sands will I ever get to be like you.

-Blue Sands by Yunalis
you make my heart beat faster, stop and drop,
in this swirling kaleidoscope of colourful dreams,
let's just escape from harsh reality.

yuna is indescribable.

2009-06-19T00:29:00.000-07:00

yunalis; my hero.

apart from my mum, jane austen, jk rowling, stephenie meyers, keira knightley skandar keynes, eoin colfer, taylor swift, paramore, damien rice, evanescence and bonnie wright la. they inspire me to be better. ;)

today had its share of ups and downs.

i love you guys. my friends, my stars.

i love my monkeyman.

why can't the drama just stop?

why can't we just live and let live?

why can't you just leave me be and let me make my own choices?

why must there be a fight about everything?

just answer me, why?

laters.

i miss you adiks :)

2009-06-17T07:49:00.000-07:00

so tuesday was totally awesome. we, 4science of 2009 went to Asrama Damai Rumah Anak Yatim at Lorong Teratai, Kuang for our Sivik assignment. I have to tell you, I'm pretty proud of my class cause' we planned the whole event from scratch without any help from our teach (though I can't tke credit for planning la, just the execution of plan, haha!).

so went to school as usual, all of us agreed to wear our class shirt :) and just waited for the rest of the gang to come swinging by cause i usually arrive at around 645? SO, after the whole hassle of putting all the food, gifts and hampers at one place, we went to the canteen for breakfast. had spicy kueyteow and my fave dish from alysha; scrumptious creamy mouthwatering cheese mashed potatoes. haha!

after buying some drinks at the shop, boarded the bus and we were on our way! :DD

i was like hyperventilating in the bus, "what if it doesn't work out?" or "what if they don't like us?" or "what if i made a major faux pas and said something stupid (which would be totally like me by the way)" and a thousand more what if scenarios went racing through my head and before i knew it we were there.

the compound was, bigger than i imagined. there were Asrama Puteri, Asrama Putera, rooms for the wardens, the surau, the playground (which is so cute, :D), the canteen and other places la but we didn't have time for a tour or anything cause we gotta wrap up at around 1230 cause the kids who are around the age 13 to 14 had to go to school during the afternoon. after settling in the surau (i felt so improper cause i didn't know we would be going into the surau or i would have brought my tudung ;/ ) we started the program. after the hassle of sorting everyone in their groups which was pretty funny actually cause' they had to imitate the sound of the animal their group represent. like if you get Group Kucing, you had to like meow meow to find your teammates. haha! it was so funny! :DD
so had a few games lined up for them, i was the technie so i just went around and helped everyone. :p don't hink i did a good job but it was fun! haha, first we did ice breaking and got to know the kids better, then we played games like Pictionary, Pakcik Kata (technically Simon Says la kan? lol. ) and Botol Kicap.
haha, well, you have a very lazy owner, bloggy so i won't really go into details here. XD but it was a real fun experience! :DD miss you guys! i'l come visit when i can kay? :)
so, i got to go, will post pics later when i get it from their respective owners. ;D and my results for mid years aren't stellar but they were okay la.
thank god i passed addmaths. :DD and had a fight with him. don't wanna go into it. :/ but i think we're okay now i guess? love you too gle. XD
i'll hold you to your words. :/

see ya later guys! :)

hope is just another four letter word

2009-06-12T10:28:00.000-07:00

oh emm gee, was just lying on the bed in my auntie's room in Melawati listening to her iPod Classic when suddenly dozens of ideas for my book came flooding in when i was listening to Jacko's Remember the Time. haha, so just a quickie and i better go and write those ideas down before the stop dam is repaired and stops my flow. XP nitey nite darls! :)

monster; you broke my heart, tissue won't fix it.

2009-06-08T07:09:00.000-07:00

Byul (Star) by Kim Ah Joong

you know, i really like the korean entertainment, like their sitcoms and movies. my fave is the my girl series with Lee Da Hae and Lee Dong Wook acting as the main characters. i remember my cousins introduced me to it when i went home to Kuang. I was totally obsessed with the hilarity of the series. XP and 200 pounds beauty, it really brought the reason of the movie home. :) can't really explain what the movie means to me but you guys should really see it, it has a lot of life lessons in it.

anyway, my fever's gone and i'm starting to feel better. :) so maybe i would pick my pen and start writing again these days. it's been a long time since i did that and my abah asked me to do the storyline on Dim Light or Silver Lining and give it to him cause' maybe he'll be doing a series on it? dunno whether real life characters or cartoon like Winx. HAHA, i was like are you kidding me? :D maybe i should start on it, but the story is kinda complicated and kind of naive. :p i'll have to rewrite it i guess.

haha, well, life isn't troubling me much these days but you know the saying, it's always quiet before the storm (is that right? to hell with it la. XP) so i'm just gonna turn in after watching Jenny/Hanna sing. :)

bye guys.

stalk my heart

2009-06-07T22:02:00.000-07:00

seriously farah, i love you darls. you hve the most wickedest ideas for names. i mean, STALK MY HEART, sedap gile sey.
lol, just another another quick post, i'm running a temperature and after months of surviving without an attack, i get one violent enough that i'm sleep deprived for a few days. :(
was just in the mood to study chemistry when this comes. a fever, stupid cold and an asthma attack. wish me luck so that i'll recover by wednesday yea guys? :)
till then, tata!

contemplation of misconceptions

2009-06-01T01:16:00.000-07:00

i don't know what to do, who to trust, who to confide in. this year has proven to be the most challenging to me, to my friendships & relationships. i feel so hopeless, helpless, alone.

some are still the same and support me through everything. new acquintances helped me to forget even for a while. others, i felt so used. after everything we've been through, i guess you just wanna throw it all away, i could see through your words babe, i know what you meant. don't try to deny it. even though you might never read these words, i just want to ask, was our friendship even worth it? this year's tests on our friendship (this goes out to more than a single person) have proven a lot. thanks for waking me up from being a total droning zombie. i don't know how many times this has been repeated and when will i ever learn from it. stupid stupid heart. and it seems that i'm losing more and more of my friends. i don't know what i did wrong, help me to see will you?

as for the other person in my life, i don't think i could trust anyone else with my own heart or secrets. i don't know what to do anymore...everything feels like a mess. i still don't know you or what you do behind my back. yea, a bit of jealousy is seeped into this though i'm sure you don't know what i'm talking about cause' i never told you bout' it. god, i don't know what the hell i'm talking about. all i ask is if you're playing with my heart, cease.

other than that, i miss you Melawatians. i miss those naive days i used to spend there. i miss my old classmates esp those who i met at VI, im sorry we didn't chat cause of my stupid amnesia prone memory, i forgot your names. hope we'll meet up someday yea?

and i miss the old me.

i think she was pretty cool, never took a shit about what anyone thought about her and always stands up for herself, not to mention a whole lot cleverer than i am now. where are you, jaf reen natassia iman bt. jaf faizal? i need you.

if you see me being a bit cold lately, i'm sorry. im just not in the mood to keep up with the antics of meaningless talk. i hope everything will turn out okay.

2009-05-29T05:10:00.000-07:00

MERDEKA!

MERDEKA!MERDEKA!MERDEKA!MERDEKA!
MERDEKA!MERDEKA!
MERDEKA!MERDEKA!
MERDEKA!MERDEKA!
MERDEKA!MERDEKA!MERDEKA!MERDEKA!

MERDEKA!MERDEKA!MERDEKA!MERDEKA!MERDEKA!MERDEKA!
MERDEKA!MERDEKA!MERDEKA!
MERDEKA!MERDEKA!MERDEKA!
MERDEKA!MERDEKA!MERDEKA!MERDEKA!MERDEKA!MERDEKA!

MERDEKA!MERDEKA!MERDEKA!MERDEKA!MERDEKA!MERDEKA!MERDEKA!MERDEKA!
MERDEKA!MERDEKA!MERDEKA!MERDEKA!
MERDEKA!MERDEKA!MERDEKA!MERDEKA!
MERDEKA!MERDEKA!MERDEKA!MERDEKA!MERDEKA!MERDEKA!MERDEKA!MERDEKA!

2009-05-29T05:02:00.001-07:00

well, david archie's new song is so cute...as was his songs always were. XP

umm, try to ignore the last post guys, only for the intended party and i think we made up so no harm done. :)

just a quick update, bye.

dear friend,

2009-05-28T02:15:00.000-07:00

(highly sensitive content ahead, approach with caution)

ko sedar tak kalau ko x self absorbed sangat dalam dunia ko sendiri, maybe ko akan sedar that the actions that you do just menyakitkan/menyedihkan hati everyone sekeliling ko? maybe ape yang dah jadi nie just nak biar ko sedar and rase ape yang ko dah buat kat ***** and friends ko selama nie. what goes around comes around okay? sampai die sanggup nak flirt dgn orang lain + bestfren ko sendiri.

ko tengok la, kita tgh bergado pasal one stupid guy. ko rase berbaloi tak kite rosakkan almost 2 years of friendship just because you felt threatened by me yang xde perasaan LANGSUNG kat Soulmate ko tue. aku cete ko x nak percaya, after all we've been through, and we know eachother's perangai and all, ko mesti tau kan most of my friends are guys? sia-sia la kite kawan kalau ko langsung x tau perangai aku and yes, most of my guyfriends are taken but unlike you, i can control my hormones la. i regard them as my friends, JUST FRIENDS.

kalau die menggatal pun, i don't even return the favour la. i respect my friends' love lives, all i do most of the time was to give him advice. ABOUT YOU. if he called, the first thing i would ask was, "have you called her?" if not, i would make him call you before anything else. don't you get it that you're hurting everyone by doing this? you're breaking our friendship just because you can't accept the bloody truth that i DO NOT wanna STEAL anyone's guy. you know who i'm so bloody obsessed with, he's the only person i can think about most of the time so what in the name of the fucking world would i wanna do with your guy?

cermin diri sendiri dulu la babe. seriously, get a reality check and look at yourself in the mirror. don't even think for one second that you're any different than who you're accusing me of. at least i felt guilty and owned up to you, because i think highly of our friendship. the same friendship which means NOTHING to you i guess since you can just throw it away and brag about our fights to everyone i know. i'm the bad guy in this.

have you forgotten all the good times we had together? we've been at eachother's sides all this while, been through almost everything, i was there for you and vice versa, did it mean anything to you? or was it just dirt you collected to bitch about with someone else? all we ever do were to become two-faced, superficial friends; bitching about everyone under the sun behind their backs.

and I CAN'T STAND IT ANYMORE. until you change your maneating, superficial ways wth your best friends and start being honest for once, i'm out. i still LOVE YOU as my BFF but i can see that this friendship is going nowhere.

we can either repair everything and laugh about it a few years later or stay away from eachother and throw away the memories of our friendship. the ball's in your court; your choice, i'll follow.

volcanoes melt you down

2009-05-26T23:41:00.000-07:00

i seriously melt everytime i hear them sing. Lisa Hannigan; the enchantingly sad singer with a voice that could turn everyone's head around and Damien Rice; his beautiful words with a rough voice to sing it aloud, enough to make anyone cry.

alone, they're good but together, they could bring world peace if they wanted to. too bad they broke up. ;(

twenty fifth may two thousand and nine

2009-05-26T04:17:00.000-07:00

hmm, loads can happen in a month or so. im too effing lazy to write a long post plus i have this massive headache but i dun wanna make it seem like i'm abandoning this blog. :) so i'll just write the highlights k?

Highlights of May:

1. mid years. i have a feeling that my results are going to be so full of shit that even my teacher won't bother to type it out, she'll just give me this handwritten note saying "There's no use in life for you, go kill yourself."

2. brushing up on my self assertiveness. seriously, i'm getting tired of the drama. it's not exciting, it's a pain in the bloody arse.

3.lost in dance comp. not going to elaborate on this.

4.lost contact with megat. :( haven't seen him in weeks and i feel like we're really drifting apart.

5.had several breakdowns on different occasions about different situations. seriously, i cried more this year than the number of times i cried from form1 to form 3. i'm not usually the teary person, more stoic like really. -.-

6.learned the value of friendship.

7. finally there's an 'us' with him. :) love you, monkey.

8. starting to realize that im less than 21 months away from SPM. 18 months, 540 days, 12960 hours away from the most important exam in my life (at the mo' la)

9. drove the cars, naza and savvy without the pretense of nearly killing somebody. i can now drive whenever i want! XP

10.started being neat and tidy, i clean my room everyday now! :)

11.started an obsession on screamo songs, courtesy of Siti Nur Balqis.

12.needs a self evaluation on my bitchy attitude.

13.IQ drop and shitty english each day.

14.i should start focusing on my aspirations. the road to becoming a pianist is still open! :) my mum decided i should start learning to play the piano again and i'm loving every second that leads to it. ;)

15. career options : astronomy, archaeology, piano (music), graphic designing and last option; law. haha.

16.missing my friends. ;(

17. quote of the month: there comes a time in life when you have to let go of all the pointless drama & the people who created it & surround yourself with the peoplewho make you laugh so hard that you forget the bad and focus solely on the good. - taken by my auntie's tumblr. www.graymare.tumblr.com

that is so true.

18. thinks i should stop rambling.

19. twenty fifth may two thousand and nine; i think i fell in love. XP but you know me, there's always that phase when you think you're in love when it's just an acceleration of your hormones and your heart starts to beat faster. and yes, baby you make my heart beat faster. :)

20. promises to update with more fulfilling goodness than the crap i've written here. well, there is the two weeks full of nothing ahead of me, maybe i should wake my muses in their togas to start giving me ideas. :)

laters darls. :)

looks like a solo tonight

2009-04-27T07:11:00.000-07:00

inspired by Hey Monday's Candles, so some of it has their lyrics in it so it's not technically plagiarism since i'm not claiming that the words are mine ( not all la, just a few lines) and i'm not technically sure whether it's a song or a poem. HAHA.

lol, shitty english.

Mazes and Lights

my heart stopped beating,

i've stopped caring,

devoid of feelings,

only darkness still remains,

running at red lights,

mind racing blurring all lines,

invisible and blind,

do you think i'm all right?

seek out candles to light my way,

you, my personal sun imploded in my face,

i couldn't see,

do you think i'll be all right?

help me, i don't even know what's real,

i don't even know who to trust,

i don't even know where to go,

help me, i don't even know you,

don't even follow me,

you'll be lost in my maze,

i'm not the jaded type,

just a long story to be trapped in,

erase the memories, the sweet memories,

erase your face in my brain,

erase the bitterness, your betrayals,

do you think i'll be alright?

help me, i don't even know what's real,

i don't even know who to trust,

i don't even know whhere to go,

help me i don't even know you,

technicolor lights blinding my eyes,

when it was you and me,

even stars fade and die,

did you really think i'll be alright?

26th April 2009

2009-04-25T19:49:00.000-07:00

a few winks later and it's near the end of April, can you believe it?
quite an eventful month though i won't go into the specifics here...went through more downs than ups really. procrastination! (is that even a word? lol)
well, just a quick post to show that i'm still alive and running, though on zero energy. :)
but don't fret! when i'm in a better sarcastic blurt out everthing mood, i'll be back

and the world should be afraid when that day comes. XP

2009-04-10T07:55:00.000-07:00

I TOOK YOUR FUCKING ADVICE TO CHANGE MY OWN TINY SELF ASSERTIVENESS AND NOW YOU'RE SAYING, "KO NI SOCIAL SANGAT, DAH BYK MENCARUT, DAH JADI SAME MACAM BUDAK KL"? MACAM AKU NI DAH JADI MACAM SETAN SGT.

KO TAK SEDAR APE KO WAT KAT AKU SELAMA NIE, AKU DGR JE KAN!? TAK PERNAH AKU TAK SUPPORT KO, KO WAT MCAM NI KAT AKU! DAHLA, BAIK ADE MUSUH SERIBU DARI ADE KAWAN MACAM NI.

WTF, AFTER WHAT YOU FUCKING DID TO ME, DO YOU THINK I WOULD TOLERATE FEELING LIKE SHIT ALL THE TIME, ANYMORE? I'VE BEEN USED BY ALMOST EVERYONE I KNOW; THEY WOULD COME TO ME IN DISTRESS AND LEAVE ME WHEN EVERYTHING'S PEACHY. I'VE BEEN EFFING USED AND DESECRATED BY MY OWN FAMILY AND 'FRIENDS', I DON'T NEED ANYMORE SHIT FROM YOU.

I'VE BEEN TRYING TO CHANGE MY UN-ASSERTIVE WAYS AND I REALISED THAT PEOPLE WERE PROBABLY GOING TO HATE ME FOR IT BUT I WAS GOING TO TAKE THAT RISK. BUT I DIDN'T KNOW THAT YOU WOULD BE THE ONE TO SAY SUCH LIES OUT OF EVERYONE WHEN YOU WERE THE ONE WHO SAID I WAS BEING PLAYED AROUND LIKE A PUPPET.

WE CAN'T EVEN TALK TO EACHOTHER ANYMORE AND I COULD SEE THAT YOU DON'T EVN WANNA BE IN MY PRESENCE, WHY KEEP UP THE LIE? TELL ME I CHANGED INTO THIS SELFISH BITCH THAT I AM NOW! TELL ME THAT YOU HATE ME!N AT LEAST I MADE AN EFFORT TO SAVE OUR FRIENDSHIP BUT AFTER ONE SILLY STUPID ACCIDENT WHICH IM SO SORRY FOR, YOU WOULDN'T EVEN FORGIVE ME FOR ONE THING WHEN I LITERALLY BEGGED FOR YOUR FORGIVENESS.

AND YOU ASK WHY WE CAN'T TALK ANYMORE, WHY I DON'T CONFIDE IN YOU ANYMORE. SIMPLE, I DON'T TRUST YOU NOT TO TREAT ME LIKE SHIT. EVERYONE DOES NOWADAYS, I FEEL LIKE A ROBOT TRYING TO SATISFY EVERYONE BUT MYSELF.

WHEN YOU ACCUSED ME OF BEING THE ONE THING I KNOW I'M NOT, THAT WAS THE LAST LINE. DON'T EVEN TRY TO PRETEND THAT YOU KNOW ME AND EVERYTHING ABOUT MY LIFE. NO ONE DOES, GET THAT?

HAVEN'T YOU NOTICED THAT EVERYONE'S CHANGING!? EVEN YOU FROM A CARING 'BROTHER' INTO THIS SELFISH, SELF RIGHTEOUS CREATURE WHO ALWAYS THINKS THAT I'VE DONE SOMETHING WRONG EVERY SINGLE MOMENT WE'RE TOGETHER. SOME I DON'T EVEN RECOGNIZE ANYMORE. ALL THIS TIME I'VE DEFENDED YOUR NAME MADE ME REALISE THAT IT WAS ALL FOR NOTHING.

YOU TREAT ME THE SAME LIKE THEM.

YOU'RE NO DIFFERENT.

Yuna - Backpacking Around Europe

2009-04-06T18:34:00.001-07:00

Backpacking Around Europe by Yuna

We question what we are
This I spent the best so far
And I miss you
When we're apart

I... I barely even know you
You rarely do this too
I don't usually talk to strangers
Until I met you

CHORUS:
And this feeling shall last
This feeling shall last
We are proud to know to not to know
That we are strong enough to let it go
And this feeling shall last
This feeling shall last
I could be a thousand years apart
And you always have my heart

Well this has been nice
We'll meet again sometime
But I can't promise you'
Coz I'm flying away

When I'm on top of some building
In Montreal,
With the lovely view
I'll think of you

(Chorus)

We're going that backpack intrigue
We're traveling around Europe
And 7 different languages
And learn how to say Hello

Oh will you do stop by the Eiffel Tower
We'll drive around Rome
Before we head on home
It's a small world darling
And we are still young

We might be so far away
We might just meet again someday

(Chorus)

stupid heart, will you ever learn?

2009-04-01T07:12:00.000-07:00

Edited: this was a empty, void post from a stupid naive girl who thought she knew everything.

you're more than just my anti-depressant,
more than just a voice on the phone,
more than an external conscience,
more than a song on the radio,
more than a though in my mind,
more than meaningful messages,
to me,
to me, you're more than that,
i just need you to see it,
the truth of the heart,
can you?

i miss you,
isn't it plain to see,
that you're the reason i'm smiling,
that you're the owner of my fragile heart,
that you're the essence of my sanity,

Mr. Sunshine (no longer exists to me)

apparently not everything.

of Tables and Crushes

2009-03-31T05:24:00.000-07:00

oh god, i'm so damn tired. on top of my increasingly tight schedule, i have a stupid stomachache that makes me feel bloated almost 24/7. :(

came to school with a sense of laziness set upon my brain, knowing that it was going to be a lousy day for some reason. good sense too, immediately after Alysha came, she told us; me, Arief, DK, and Inas, about the fight between Naz and Tiara. They've been at it since the beginning of the year and actually resulted in a fist fight initiated by Tiara (for good reason because Naz actually let out in front of her whole class of Tiara's most protected secret) and they had to be brought to the Counselors. I wasn't there but from both point of views, the fight was over and they calmed down but the bitterness was still there even after being best friends last year.

Anyway, back to today, Alysha said that they had ANOTHER big fight that their mothers were involved in too. after all the discussion, we went to class and found out that the RK's reassembled the tables. AGAIN.

and of course, we; Alysha, Balqis, Axreen, Bash and I got stuck with the last row of seats. Yea, it's a good thing that i'm so damn TALL and have effing great MAGNIFYING eyes. Then, they had the gall to complain to US that some of their friends didn't get a seat. wtf? they were the ones who changed the seats, you should KNOW about the positions for you own selfish SELVES. but what the hell, i kept my mouth shut, trying to keep to my vow that i would try not to get into any unnecessary fights this year unless it's TOO MUCH.

and crushes? I dunno, I think I made a decision not to enter into any relationship this year and just concentrate on school and friends. i can't go to Paris/Aussie without any effort right?!

lol, we'll see how that goes huh? XP

registered for tuition at JG today and met Aisyah. miss you babe! :) and i can't believe that she's another to say that i haven't changed AT ALL. people actually said that my sis, Inas looks much more matured than I am. HAHA. I guess that's from observing my 'crazy antics' and 'psycho-ness' daily in school (quoted by D). lol.

Noticed that I'm seriously far behind in Chemistry cause I only understood half of what Sir explained about Chemical Formulae when I'm actually beginning to enjoy Chem. :(

will have to work harder.

30th March, 2009

2009-03-30T04:23:00.000-07:00

Nothing much happened today, went to school, studied, went to meet Pn Che Zainun, the Penolong Kanan to discuss about the dance comp details, then went to Biology till 230 pm and hanged around Alysha's house, talking and talking and talking (xp) with Balqis and Alysha.

After that, Tiara picked me up around 530 pm to go and have a jamming session with Arief M and Alif. We didn't do much actually, just listened. At this one time, I went out and talked to Tiara and they were playing Bunkface's Situasi and we were singing like hell outside. ;DD but we went in the room, we didn't really have the courage to sing. haha, after that Mar and his band came and I just started to unwind by listening.

Loud music is my medicine. ;)

Around 645 pm we paid and went out cause we didn't really know how to go home, Tiara suggested that we walk but I was a lil' afraid cause my house was further from theirs but luckily we managed to catch my bus. :) all in all, a typical day. got mountains of homework; bio exercises, one chemistry report and maths exercises. :( oh and i've got to get started on revision to get those 7a's! XP

laters.

Earth Hour

2009-03-28T04:41:00.001-07:00

Save the Earth!

Did you guys support Earth Hour yesterday from 830 to 930 pm? Good for those of you who did, seriously for me it was really enlightening. Pretty awesome.

It looked really magical actually with the house in total darkness and we lit the candles and placed them in my mum's be-yoo-tiful candle holders, placing them around the house. We, that is my mum, Inas, Ira, Ilena, Ikesha, Megat, Aqib, Alysha, Azreen, Tiara and me laid down the bed comforters on the driveway and we just gossiped, played around and ate till 12. (haha, prolonged earth hour!) Owh, and being total camwhores of course! :DD

Before they went home, we signed these posters of the Earth Hour thing to keep,though they forgot and left theirs. XP The teens (us la! :p) went around the backyard and we had like this candlelit discussion. :) LOADS came out like pouring out our bittersweet memories, curing insecurities, which year was the best and dirty talks (that's mainly me and tiara, XP). Sha was a bit down for some reasons but we cured that in a jiffy. HAHA.

Earth Hour was really an experience. :) loved it <3

Owh and right now I'm seriously addicted with Nevershoutnever's Happy and this Brit band (at least I think it's British) named The Fratellis. Heard that from a friend's profile and the lyrics are so sweet and sincere, albeit being a bit sarcastic. ;P another reason why I love the way the English talk. The song's name is Whistle For The Choir, I think.

When the hell will some blue eyed Brit with some hot accent going to pick me off my feet? XP

p/s will post pics of Earth Hour later. :) credits of Sha's DSLR of course.

the Dark Ages.

2009-03-28T01:39:00.000-07:00

Dark Age or Dark Ages is a term in historiography referring to a period of cultural decline or societal collapse that took place in Western Europe between the fall of Rome and the eventual recovery of learning. Increased understanding of the accomplishments of the Middle Ages in the 19th century challenged the characterization of the entire period as one of darkness -taken by wikipedia.org

quote of the day; Hope is a waking dream by Aristotle.

Do you have the feeling of drowning in a sea of your failures, fears and low self esteem?
Me too.

BUT don't feel alone, be aware that your peers and friends are also probably going through the same phase. We're going through our real metamorphosis from a kid into a mini-adult. It happens to everyone.

Note the changes around you. Equipped with the new knowledge by the zombie turning/brain washing education given freely to us, we start to notice the sense of abandonment. Even the smallest thing is starting to look impossible when a year ago maybe, it would as simple as saying "Harry Potter". You start to doubt your own skills in school or your social standing.

I know, because I'm going through it too. Even though I'm writing this positive outlook or third person view, I still feel shitty inside.

Just be aware that you're going through the Dark Ages of your adolescence, your very own war within yourself. This too shall pass. All I ever do now is just smile, hide away all my insecurities.

It sucks. But it works. Don't let anyone know who you are. Your soul is the only thing you have to yourself and that too will be snatched away one day.

Makes life a bit unbearable to think about huh?

Shoot, I don't even know what I'm writing. Damn.

Making people scared won't get you very far.

2009-03-27T19:37:00.000-07:00

Ooooooooooo Ooooooooooo
Friday night last orders at the pub,
Get in the car and drive to the club,
There's a massive crowd outside so we get in to the queue
It's quarter past 11 now
we won't get in till quarter to two.

It's quarter to two and we get to the front,
Girl on a guest list dressed like a c***
She asked security to check inside my shoes,
You can play this game with me but you know you're gonna lose.

[Hook]
Looked me up and down,
I don't make a sound,
There's a lesson that I want you to learn,
If you're gonna play with fire
then you're gonna get burned,

[Chorus]
Don't try and test me cos you'll get a reaction,
Another drink and I'm ready for action,
I don't know who you think you are,
But making people scared wont get you very far.

Ooooooooooooo Ooooooooooooo
In the club make our way to the bar,
Good dancing love but you should have worn a bra.
Guy on the mike and he's making too much noise,
There's these girls in the corner wanting attention from the boys.

I see these girls and they're shouting through the crowd,
Don't understand why they're being really loud.
Make their way over to me,
And try to push me out the way,
I'll push her back,
She looks at me and says,
What you tryna say?

[Hook]
[Chorus x2]

Oooooooooooooo Oooooooooooooo

Great song for pissing people off and trying to get into a fight. Long live Lily Allen! Her songs explicit but straight to the point and it can seriously **** people up. XP You should listen to Friday Night, Smile, The Fear, and my current favourite, Oh My God. ;)

Yesterday was hectic and frustrating.

Went to school, that was alright. Nothing much happened. During English, we had a shouting match with the RK girls on how we're gonna fix the class. Didn't actually realize that a certain dude was actually by my class during one particularly intense shouting moment. (blush) haha! A lot of flirting behind doors yesterday actually, that was fun. xP

After school, I went to Alysha's to wait till 3 for the dance auditions we're holding for the juniors. The comp is still a month away but we're trying to prepare earlier cause we're abandoning the old moves for new ones from Inas. :l hope it will work, especially since the teacher in charge is an old wuss and lazy fart.

[sorry, loads of swearing and backtalking in this one. lol, isn't it always? :p]

Taught the girls on the old dance moves so that Aly and Inas could pick out the okay ones. I don't really know who she picked, but we already have 8 unknown names. :)

(and I've noticed that my English is like mediocre to the lowest degree these days. Shit.)

Lol, after that we watched the theater group for a while, (I didn't get the part, ;( but it's okay la. At least it's in BM, if it's in English I would be more disappointed I guess. XP) Axreen was with Aiman and Bash, T went to top up her creds with Reen and I went to 7e with Aly. Then, we went our way to the bball court to watch the guys play. Noticed that the guy was walking slowly, I seriously don't know what game he's trying to play but read this; I Don't Effing Care Anymore. Go and **** and flirt with whoever you want, don't count me in as one of your playtoys. Kay? I mean, try to play hard to get and don't think I haven't noticed your eyes all day but quit it. It's not funny when you're trying to play with my feelings, babe.

Got a ride with Aly with Arief, Reen and T at around 7 something. Went home, laid on the sofa, found out that that man-whore's game all along, talked to Megat for over an hour [missed him! :) ] and slept.

Perfect effing day wasn't it?

So, ANYWAYS, today at 8 30 to 9 30, turn off your lights people!

Its the EARTH HOUR! time to give back to the Earth some medicine and break since we've been killing it for the past century with man's machinations and tree killers everywhere. ;)

Just shut your lights and every electrical appliances for one hour AND that's it! We'll save thousands of energy from just doing that. :) good way to support the world ain't it?

Well, i'm going off for a long overdue bath and to murder my Physics textbook! :)

toodles! (that's kinda annoying when someone say that isn't it? 'Toodles' I mean, I don't know why. I'm a loser.)

delayed post. O.O

2009-03-26T04:41:00.000-07:00

I know i know. This blog is on the verge of death, I'm really sorry but I've been really busy lately with studies and stuff. Form 4 is proving to be really tiring and nerve wrecking for me since it's like a whole new realm where I feel like I'm tested beyond my limits and every day passes by and I feel like I'm going through it like a robot, doing everything only for the sake of completing it and forgetting about it a second later. Everything seems meaningless these days and every step I take seems to be wrong.

Sorry for sounding so pessimistic but I just need a place to vent out everything.
The first test of March was...alright I guess. I'm a bit disappointed by my results since I studied my arse off, does 'sleepless nights' mean anything to you guys? :l I'm sure we're all going through it. So carry on yeah? :)

And it really didn't make my day when our Maths teacher in giving our ModMaths papers were criticising our every effort and saying stuff like, "the 2007 batch was the best this school has ever seen" or "Maths needs talent and the brains to accomplish it, you have the brains but if you don't have the talent, why pursue something you will NEVER accomplish in". I wanted to cry or slap her because I think if you love something (and I do love Maths) and you're willing to work to be better at it, you can be SUCCESSFUL one day at it. I seriously think what she said was bullshit. Its so obvious that she thinks that we're a bunch of nimwits and that the 4s batch of this year are a disgrace. Sure, you can boast about your past successful students but don't make us feel like we're dirt on your shirt or the pebble in your shoe. It's damn BULL.

I made a vow to myself today.

I, Jaf Reen Natassia Iman bt. Jaf Faizal, hereby vow to prove those RK students and those stuck up teachers of 4S 2009 batch that we, the underdogs can be better than them and will commit herself to studying and improving herself everyday to get at least 7A's and above by the April test or by the Mid-Year Examinations and also we can get an A in the almost impassable Add Maths.

I'm seriously taking this whole thing right to the point. And I've been thinking a lot lately about the metamorphosis I undertook during the past year and where I am now and what happened to my behaviour and aspirations and I have to admit that I actually became someone I hate.

I hate myself, can you believe it? And you know what they say when you hate yourself, you'll hate everyone. I've become a lazy, stuck up, wrapped-up-in-her-own-world, superficial bitch. And I prepared to admit that. Because it's true. But I'm going to right my wrong. I swear that I will change for better or I'll never be able to live with myself. I've treated my friends and family wrongly and used them for my own selfish use. And that goes against every fibre of my body since I've never done that in my entire life, but my morality was so easily turned by the seduction of today's times and addiction. Addiction for popularity and the feeling of being liked by everyone. Addiction to be accepted by everyone.

Accept yourself and others will follow. This is what I say to myself nowadays, starting this week. I don't need to prove myself to anyone, I just need to prove myself that I can do whatever my mind set it to. I've broken confidences, gave away secrets like they're worth nothing and that is WRONG. I was wrong and now, I'm going to change it. Change everything.

I'm sorry to everyone I've insulted, talked bad at, stabbed at the back and everything.
I am really sorry.

I've also realised that I haven't been a very good friend to my mates. I'm sorry guys, I had a lapse in my dysfunctional brain and if I've done anything wrong, tell me yea? :)

I resolved to be a better person this year. And that is done first by keeping secrets that people trust me with and proving to my Mum especially that I can make her proud again like those years nack in Melawati and form One when I could do no wrong. I'm sorry Mak for bringing your name down. I've lied so many times to you that I've lost count and eventhough you won't read this I hope that you will see in a few months that I'm trying to make you proud. :)

and I think that this time around, I'm going to stand true to my beliefs. To make my own opinions and not be someone's or anyone's backup eventhough I don't believe in what they're saying. I choose my own road. I want to be an assertive girl who's sure of herself and can be trustworthy to others. ;) That' my resolution, not for 2009 but also for the rest of my life.

Results of the March test:
Bahasa Malaysia- 58(C)
English-97(A)
Modern Mathematics- 66(B)
Additional Mathematics- 32(F)
Biology- 72(A)
Chemistry- 77(A)
Physics- 65 (B)
Agama Islam- unknown
Sejarah-83 (A)

Yes, I know. It's appalling.

And yes, about a certain guy, I've liked him for quite a while, since last year actually, but I've decided to put behind the frivolity of crushes behind me. Crushes and the feeling of liking a certain hot or understanding guy is unavoidable to a girl of my age and with stupid raging hormones but I've decided not to think too much about it and to take no notice of it or not to make a scene. I know I've been crazy about a certain guy lately and I think he and everyone else noticed but maybe, I'm starting to forget about it, just as a mild crush. I'm starting to IGNORE it and Azreen, Alysha, Balqis and Bash, you are spared from hearing me talk on and on about him starting from today. :p I think he knows that I like him but what the hell? XP

crushes are starting to get boring. :P

well, gtg. Need to do revision for next month's test. ;)

p/s: Farah, I hope this LONG LONG post made up for the months of zero updates. XP

bahrain.

2008-11-29T11:17:00.000-08:00

heya, suddenly thought of updating. farah has been biting my head off bout' abandoning my blog. XP

the food's here kinda heavy, the sights are pretty cool, there's LOADS of sand, there's thousands different kinds of stuff at the malls around here (it actually reminds me of KL) and the Arabians can be pretty rude but it's cool. : )

lol, been here for a week and a half. dunno what to say actually. lemme just tell you about what I did today. Woke up pretty late...about 11 o'clock. Took a bath and everything, Uncle Radzlan decided to take us out...somewhere. Lol. I slept in the car and when I woke up, I saw...the BEACH! YAY!!! I loove it...the feeling of the sand between your toes, the taste of the salty air and the beautiful sights. love it. ;)

But after that Alysha was grumbling about the sand into her pumps so we took off. Suddenly we saw a few motorbikes by the edge of the desert. 3 dinars for 10 minutes per person. WOOHOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I've never felt so much freedom in my whole life!!

Maybe we'll be coming back next week. :))

After that, we wentfor a bite to eat, and now we're home. :)

i'm tired out anyway. update later! :))

p.s:what's with the smiley faces? haha.

2008-11-25T04:37:00.000-08:00

Instructions:
*Bold the statements that are true to you.
*Italicize the statements that you wish were true.
*Leave the fibs alone.
*Then, stab 5 people to do the same test.
~~~~~~~~~~

I’m 170cm + tall.
I don’t know what I want at the moment.
I’m not happy.
I hate my friends.
I hate my life.
I hate my grades.
He drives.
I’m bored of driving.
I have a white handbag.
I love dancing.
I go clubbing every week.
Shopping is bullshit.
I have a tattoo of a star.
I got my navel pierced.
I have friends that take drugs.
90% of my friends smoke.
I’m studying Fashion.
I have a business running.
I hate cartoons.
I hate someone.
I have 10 Guess handbags.
I buy CLEO every month.
My parents don’t know about my blog.
I have an iPod.
I don’t have faith in the current “one”.
My school mates know about my blog.
I wanted to be a fashion designer.
I love rock emo bands.
I hate it when people cancel last minute meet ups.
I’m a rebel.
I’m starting to like wearing dresses.
I don’t believe in love.
High school's filled with drama.
My parents have faith in me.
I’ve bought shoes this month.
A blogger bitched about me before.
I hate sports.
I heart Italian food.
I hate meeting new people.
I hate nail polish.
The mother bear gives me hugs.
People should start appreciating me.
High school was the worst time of my life.
I have red hair.
One Utama is my second home.
I’m a guy.
I’m scared of my Biology exam.
I hate vacations.
We’ll last.
I believe in long distance relationships.
I’m going to get high and smoke weed one day soon.
I’ve robbed an old lady.
I’m starting to like applying make-up.
I was a tomboy.
At times I think I still am a tomboy.
I love bitching about people behind their backs.
I hate surprise parties.
I hate planning parties.
I’m a sinner. (not sure)
I have a Wii.
I can live without music.
Video games are a waste of time.
I miss the father bear.
I love being in love.
I know how to cook.
I have 100% freedom.
Boys are assholes.
I hate Math.
I love horror films.
I’m happy with what I have.
I slept in my parents’ room for 3 days after watching Scream when I was a kid.
My old friends keep in touch with me. (contradiction)
I don’t read newspapers.
The news is such a waste of time.
Blogging is a waste of time.
I hate animals.
I can’t live without make-up.
I curse like a pirate.
I’m happy with my 11 year old car.
I hate people that are smart.
I love Apple Juice.
I can’t drink for nuts.
I believe that everyone in their teens have lost their virginity.
I’ve got a new phone.
I’m going to get a new pair of shoes by the end of this month.
I love swimming.
I haven’t worked out since March.
I love my friends and family.
I'm hot.

filler again.

2008-11-20T01:07:00.000-08:00

so i'm guessing you know that I'm in Bahrain. a bit quick now, i'll update when i can, maybe from my diary posts (but edited of course) :P

bye for now!!! : )

one word, infinite meanings.

2008-11-17T05:39:00.000-08:00

Only. Type. One. Word.

Where is your cell phone?
unknown

Your crush?
hell

Your hair?
untameable

Your mother?
out

Your father?
unknown

Your favorite thing?
music

Your dream last night?
nightmarish

Your favorite drink?
coke

Your dream car?
red

Say something about life?
complicated

Your exes?
annoying

Your fear?
death

Where do you want to be in 10 years?
paris

Who did you hang out with last night?
alysha

What are you not good at?
everything

Muffins?
chocolate

When you DIE, u'd rather be CREMATED or BURIED?
or

Where did you grow up?
home

Last place you've been to?
couch

What are you wearing?
garments

Where are you?
here

Your pet/s?
crookshanks

Your computer?
deceased

Your life?
sucks

Your mood?
guess

What/Who are you thinking about right now?
ahem

Your car?
unknown

Your work?
unattainable

Your favorite color?
black

When was the last time you laughed?
seconds

Last time you cried?
morning

School?
over

5 people you tag?

-syawal.
-kare.
-dzaki.
-inas.
-fill in your name here.

just a filler post. off to Bahrain tomorrow! wish me luck! loves, iman.

revelations.

2008-11-02T23:45:00.000-08:00

i should have seen it long coming. i mean, i noticed for three years already.

megat is right. i don't belong here. though he forgot to include himself in the reason why.
i'm just so fucking naive to actually think they want me around because they see me as their friend. even mimi is starting to ignore me.

he gave me a long lecture the other day about this and said that he'll be there to help me. i'm stupid to even believe him. he's right about the rest of the stuff just not about the being there thing. now, everyone's leaving me behind, accusing me of things i didn't do or something i did for their own sakes.

i'm so fucking tired of taking care of everyone's hearts.

they use me for every fucking reason and i complied.. after that they left me to the gutters, thinking i was a nuisance and blame me for every single fucking wrong thing that happened in their lives. and they have to put me down, try to get in my head that i'm not good enough. i'm always not good enough.

it doesn't bother me anymore. mind over matter.

what more do you want from me? do you want me to jump over a train for you? polish your shoes? fix you broken relationships?

what fucking more?

i never thought i would say this but now i don't fucking care what you think about me.

next year, i'm going to try and start new. if they still wanna fuck around with me, i don't care. i'll go. that's what you guys want anyway right?

i'm that backstabbing bitch who likes to mess with everyone's lives, that crazy wannabe, that naive let-people-step-over-her kind of girl. right?

i just don't fucking care anymore.

twilight tv spots

2008-11-02T19:23:00.000-08:00

OMFEFG!!!!!

ARE THEY TRYING TO KILL US WITH ANTICIPATION OVER THERE?!?!?!?!

DAH LA I WON'T BE SEEING TWILIGHT WITH YOU GUYS! THEN THIS COMES UP!!!

AHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

thank you for the music.

2008-11-02T05:44:00.000-08:00

omg, for anyone who hasn't seen mamma mia, go now!

except for the tinny adulation, it's pretty cool! i've seen it twice now and i'm still addicted to the songs. who would have thought that Abba's songs were pretty nice huh?

and there's another reason why i love mamma mia so much. syawal knows! :p

anyway, i miss you TS-ers so much! just got back from Azreen's b'day party and abah's house.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DARLS!!!

SO, just talked to Abah about the clothes for Bahrain. I'm getting Ibu's old winter coats and maybe we're a buying a windbreaker. :) god, i'm going to miss everyone so much! and i'll miss spending my bday with you guys! :((

speaking of bdays, i want a SLR camera!! :)

haha, but maybe you guys can't afford it...nvm, i'll buy it myself.. when i have the money. :/

now all i have is a damn picture of it.

*sighs.

lol. i miss him so fucking damn much.

you know, i just realised there's no replacement. maybe if we fell apart(which will never happen, i hope) i'll still remember him. (sigh)

we came close actually. thank god it didn't happen. i could stay in his arms forever if i can but had to go. didn't want my mum to see. anyway, she thinking about letting me date him officially! :D

sigh, the ups and downs of teenagehood.

iPersonic?

2008-10-27T06:35:00.001-07:00

took it from sya's blog.

Spontaneous Idealist (SI)

(Just visiting? Take the free personality test and determine your iPersonic type!)

Spontaneous Idealists are creative, lively and open-minded persons. They are humorous and dispose of a contagious zest for life. Their enthusiasm and sparkling energy inspires others and sweeps them along. They enjoy being together with other people and often have an uncanny intuition for their motivations and potential. Spontaneous Idealists are masters of communication and very amusing and gifted entertainers. Fun and variety are guaranteed when they are around. However, they are sometimes somewhat too impulsive in dealing with others and can hurt people without really meaning to do so, due to their direct and sometimes critical nature.

This personality type is a keen and alert observer; they miss nothing which is going on around them. In extreme cases, they tend to be oversensitive and exaggeratedly alert and are inwardly always ready to jump. Life for them is an exciting drama full of emotionality. However, they quickly become bored when things repeat themselves and too much detailed work and care is required. Their creativity, their imaginativeness and their originality become most noticeable when developing new projects and ideas - they then leave the meticulous implementation of the whole to others. On the whole, Spontaneous Idealists attach great value to their inner and outward independence and do not like accepting a subordinate role. They therefore have problems with hierarchies and authorities.

If you have a Spontaneous Idealist as your friend, you will never be bored; with them, you can enjoy life to the full and celebrate the best parties. At the same time, they are warm, sensitive, attentive and always willing to help. If Spontaneous Idealists have just fallen in love, the sky is full of violins and their new partners are showered with attention and affection. This type then bubbles over with charm, tenderness and imagination. But, unfortunately, it soon becomes boring for them once the novelty has worn off. Boring everyday life in a partnership is not for them so that many Spontaneous Idealists slip from one affair into another. However, should the partner manage to keep their curiosity alive and not let routine and familiarity gain the upper hand, Spontaneous Idealists can be inspiring and loving partners.

Adjectives which describe your type

spontaneous, enthusiastic, idealistic, extroverted, theoretical, emotional, relaxed, friendly, optimistic, charming, helpful, independent, individualistic, creative, dynamic, lively, humorous, full of zest for life, imaginative, changeable, adaptable, loyal, sensitive, inspiring, sociable, communicative, erratic, curious, open, vulnerable

These subjects could interest you

literature, art, music, parties, concerts, travel, dancing, eating out, joint pleasure

harry potter and the half blood prince

2008-10-27T05:58:00.001-07:00

well, haven't beenn updating some real stuffs for a while.

it's not that i'm busy or anything, just that of the laziness. XP

so in between the song searching, a bit of soul searching in daily bicycle rides (without my mother knowing, she has all but chained me to my room...a bit paranoid i'm sure of the news) the singing in the showers, snoozing, open houses, sneaking around, i snapped a few photos here and there.

you know, i'm seriously considering photography. i love it.

through photography, you can show the world through your eyes. what you see in daily life. what some lines on a rock can look like. the happiness of a younger and annoying sister. the daily strife of an ordinary family.

went to sunway last friday with alysha, azreen, inas, megat, khalis and hanif. saw high school musical 3. it was actually better than i expected. loved the soundtrack, i think i'll buy it after i actually saved up some money for a camera of my own.

ignore this; I WANT A CAMERA!!!! (hint hint)

bought a dress, a red tank top and a vest. god, i should have brought more money with me. i wanted to buy the other two dresses; a floral print one and a minimalistic black strapless dress, it was GORGEOUS! but sadly, stupidly, i bought a blah chocolate dress...again. i need to go shopping. ;(

on the way back at around 12.30? fooled around in the car...i'm going to miss these moments with megat and hanif and khalis when i go to bahrain. :(

okay, what is with the sad smiley faces!?
sorry, a bit down today due to the disturbing revelation i had from megat the other day. i know he was telling me the thing he told me only for my best interests but i didn't even noticed i was crying until he told me to go to the toilet to wash my face. hanif didn't wanna let go of me the whole time (except in the bathroom la! XP) and i kinda welcomed his arms being around me. : )

so...farah, i think i can go to the 15th. if i can't, i'll sneak out and go there anyway. xp

I MISS YOU GUYS SO MUCH.

be prepared for a big bear hug and a lot of cam-whoring. :P
and can i bring hanif and megat? :o)

oh! did you guys saw the new harry potter and the half blood prince trailer? i'm not sure which one i anticipate most; twilight or harry potter. haha, anyway, looking back at the the trailer, i can't remember most of the scenes in the book. OFF I GO THEN!! (iman: now where's that blasted book..)

yuna@yunalis.

2008-10-27T04:40:00.000-07:00

ome.

you gotta listen to this girl. yuna.

when i heard about her from hanif and another guy, i was shocked to find out that she's actually a local singer. and she wears tudung can you believe it?

that goes to show that you cannot judge talent by appearances.

her voice is like the combo of corrine bailey rae and norah jones while her style of songs are totally unique, spoken and sang from the heart.

i've only heard dan sebenarnya, rocket, and deeper conversation but i'm sure she has other heart melting songs. check her out! :))

that was yuna singing dan sebenarnya.

yuna singing a cover of oh chentaku's polaroid.

yuna singing deeper conversation.

ahh!!!!!!!!

yuna - dan sebenarnya

oh bulan

jangan layan diriku lagi pabila,

air mata membasahi pipi

dan lagu2 di radio seolah2 memerli aku

pabila,kau bersama yg lain

adakah perasaaan benci ini sebenarnya cinta

yang masih bersemadi untukmu

dan sebenarya ku mengharapkan

di sebalik senyuman mu itu

kau juga merindui aku

ku enggan berpura pura ku bahagia

ku enggan melihat kau bersama si dia

oh ku akui cemburu telah menular dalam diri pabila

kau bersama yang lain

adakah perasaaan benci ini sebenarnya cinta

yang masih bersemadi untukmu

dan sebenarya ku mengharapkan

di sebalik senyuman mu itu kau juga merindui aku

pabila kau merenung matanya

ku rebah jatuh ke bumi

di saat kau benar-benar mahu pergi

seperti ku bernafas dalam air

adakah perasaaan benci ini sebenarnya cinta

yang masih bersemadi untukmu

dan sebenarya ku mengharapkan

di sebalik senyuman mu itu kau juga merindui aku

oh–

yuna-deeper conversation

Is your favourite colour blue?

Do you always tell the truth?

Do you believe in outerspace?
And im learning you

Is your skin as tanned as mine?

Does your hair flow sideways?

Did someone took a portion of your heart?
And im learning you

And if you dont mind

Can you tell me

All your hopes and fears and

Everything that you believe in

Would you make a difference in the world

I'd love for you to take me to a deeper conversation

Only you can make me

I let my guard down for you

And in time you will too

If you dont mind
Can you tell me
All your hopes and fears and
Everything that you believe in
Would you make a difference in the world
I'd love for you to take me to a deeper conversation
Only you can make me

If you dont mind
Can you tell me
All your hopes and fears and
Everything that you believe in
Would you make a difference in the world
I'd love for you to take me to a deeper conversation
Only you can make me

(4x)
Deeper Conversation
let me

katy perry - hot n' cold

2008-10-19T22:07:00.000-07:00

this song is so cute + the video too! XP

dedicated to a certain mr. _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

i'm so over you/.

soaking up the randomness.

2008-10-19T18:40:00.000-07:00

haha, took it from sya's blog. totally random. noticed that bout' myy blog? its full of random shit. xp

RULE : Each player of this game starts off with 15 weird things / habits / little known facts about yourself. People who get tagged need to write a blog of their own 15 weird habits /things / little known facts as well as state this rule clearly. At the end, you need to choose 10 people to be tagged and list their names. No TAG backs!

1. i can't function without music/my friends/a book in my hands or if i have a frigging cold.

2. i love being crazy, everyone's aware of it. XP

3. i love being crazy in the rain. yesterday was awesome! we got soaked to our skins 4 times in a day. lol.

4. i hate haters/posers/people who think that they're all that and think that everyone is actually looking up to them. WAKE UP YOU IDIOTS! everyone is their own unique self and if they so happen to wear your same clothes or make up, can you stop and think that we ALL shop at the same hangouts? I mean, how many known teen haunts are they?

One Utama. KLCC. Times Square. Mid Valley. Sunway. Summit USJ. The Curve. Even the frigging IKEA.

5. i'm in love with randomness.

6.i like to speak loud. especially about my opinions. and i've learned not to take shit about what people think about me.

7. "hopeless romanticism" was my favourite phrase. now it's "fucking assholes". NOTE: this was spoken continously after the 17th of October. XP

8. Eight is going to be the number of my siblings. I know; i'm going to be the eldest of 8 possible sisters or 7 sisters and 1 lil' bro. (dies of exhaustion)

9. PMR IS OVER YOU BITCHES!!!!!!!!!! suck it up and live! XP

10. thank god, my immortal writer's block is over. so yes farah, i'll now finish your darling 'Silver Lining'.

11. I'm considering photography. and graphic design. and aswara. opinions? ;P

12. you know, i've never, EVER experienced silence? if i'm not listening to the radio or my laptop or my not-working iPOD, or my friend's mp3, i'm usually humming or singing or singing in my thoughts or just plain doing stuff. silence is scary. or come to think of it, silence can be very LOUD. :))

13. i'm missing you TS-ers so much!!!!

14. i found my edward/jasper/ron/jamal(from the poison apples)/every prince charming or loving male character in every book in the whole wide world. i love you insensitive, caring, smelly guy. ;p

15. thank god this thing is over. i was running out of ideas. XP

I tag...
EVERYONE.

......................................

2008-10-17T09:08:00.000-07:00

i knew this would happen the second i would go home.

she asked me to leave for the second time.

third time's the time i'm leaving.

can't handle all the emotional strain; might end up in some hospital somewhere if this goes on.

i just...i just can't stand it anymore.
15 years are the most i can handle.
just thought i'll let you guys know.

logging off.

merdeka?

2008-10-16T20:00:00.000-07:00

ome!!! CAN YOU BELIEVE IT?!!?!!?!

THE EFFING PMR IS EFFING OVER!!!!!!!

still overcomed by the emotion of it all. XP update laters!

and kare!!! i wanna meet you with syawal, farah and the gang!!! i miss you guys so effing much.

right.

2008-10-09T08:57:00.000-07:00

i planned a really long post; i had it all in my head just now when *poof* it dissappeared.

not in the mood anymore. i'll just make statements and sign off.

1. when it's in the past, it's in the past. let it go.

2. i've been the most selfish, worst kind of friend ever. to everyone. this is why i want to apologise, not because it's the syawal month; just because i'm really moved and guilty for everyone i've done wrong to. sincerely, I'm Sorry.

3. tears are surprisingly comforting.

4. pmr is near. and i don't really care. i think i'm ready. i hope.

5. i think i have semi-amnesia.

6.fashion is overrated. (god, that was so random)

7. i love my friends.

8. i love everyone.

9. i love that auntie who sells 'goreng pisang' everyday in front of the school. and the guy at the car sales table. i'm trying to love life; when it's not batterin me in the head so much.

10. i love him.

11.before praying, my mum said this random thing.

"you know when you were in standard 2, you forgot to hang your shoes up so on Monday, your shoes were too wet for you to wear. you have to face a choice between staying home and missing school or go to school in your sandals and face the music. you know how to make the right choice then. i'm not sure how your decision-making is now"

that really did it.

12. i'm thinking of starting new; just go to somewhere far and forget everyone.

13. then i remember that running away doesn't make anything better.

14. and i'll probably miss everyone too much.

15. now i'm rambling.

16. music is how i unravel and relax.

17. i really want you guys to be friends again. you know who you are. remember the good times we had together? goofing around in times square? being camwhores with santa and the elves? lepak-ing in standard 6? that animal season; when all of us got attacked by a certain type of animal? sya was a snake, mine was a snail? laughing out loud at random things? (okay that last one was me) don't throw away the good stuffs over a fight. please. i'm begging you.

18. i'm going off now.

19.wish me luck on PMR.

20.good luck to all form 3 students around Malaysia.

: )

random. it takes away stress.

2008-10-09T08:03:00.000-07:00

Your Hair Should Be Red

You are a passionate person... both in love and in life.

You have many causes that are important to you. You can be very intense.

You are very fiery. You speak up, and you don't mince words.

You also have a very flamboyant personality. You love to show off.

You are both eccentric and expressive. You like to share your unique point of view.

You can become quite impassioned. So impassioned that you can seem a little overbearing.

What Color Hair Should You Have?

You Follow Your Heart

You're romantic, sentimental, and emotional.

You tend to fall in (and out of) love very quickly.

Some may call you fickle, but you can't help where your emotions take you.

You've definitely broken a few hearts, but you're not a heartbreaker by nature.

Your intentions are always good, even if they change with the wind

Do You Follow Your Head or Your Heart?

Your Five Variable Love Profile

Propensity for Monogamy:

Your propensity for monogamy is medium.

In general, you prefer to have only one love interest.

But it's hard for you to stay devoted for too long!

There's too much eye candy to keep you from wandering.

Experience Level:

Your experience level is high.

You've loved, lost, and loved again.

You have had a wide range of love experiences.

And when the real thing comes along, you know it!

Dominance:

Your dominance is medium.

You tend to be the one with more power.

You aren't a total control freak in relationships..

But of course you don't mind getting you way!

Cynicism:

Your cynicism is low.

You are an eternal optimist when it comes to love and romance.

No matter how many times you've been hurt - you're never bitter.

You believe in one true love, your perfect soulmate.

And if you haven't found true love yet, you know you will soon.

Independence:

Your independence is medium.

In relationships, you need both "me time" and "we time."

You usually find it easy to be part of a couple.

But occasionally you start to feel a little smothered.

The Five Variable Love Test

You Are Having a Red Day

It's going to take courage, strength, and even a little defiance to get through today.

Luckily, you're up for the task. You have lots of energy to spare.

You feel stimulated, motivated, and ready to go. You're eager to take on anything life throws at you.

And if you need to stand up and fight for what's important to you, you're ready!

What Color Day Are You Having?

You are the Sense of Sight

You are a very observant, detail oriented person.

You are able to take in a lot of information at once.

You often see things that other people never notice.

You have a good eye for design and aesthetics.

You love to be surrounded by beauty - natural or not.

When you imagine how something should look, you see it clearly in your mind.

Which of the Five Senses Are You?

You Communicate With Your Ears

You love conversations, both as a listener and a talker.

What people say is important to you, and you're often most affected by words, not actions.

You love to hear complements from others. And when you're upset, you often talk to yourself.

Music is very important to you. It's difficult to find you without your iPod.

How Do You Communicate?

PMR in..

2008-10-07T22:04:00.000-07:00

can you believe it? PMR is in 5 fucking goddamn close days.

lol. and im still here updating this blog. XD

anyways, just got some news that brighten my day up a bit.

Twilight Release Dates

USA
21 November 2008
Chile
27 November 2008
Czech Republic
27 November 2008
Malaysia
27 November 2008
Netherlands
4 December 2008
Portugal
4 December 2008

WOOHOO!!!!!!!!

1ST HARI RAYA? selamat hari raya aidil fitri darls! :DD

2008-10-01T08:51:00.000-07:00

first off i would like to say SELAMAT HARI RAYA AIDILFITRI TO EVERYONE THAT I KNOW & MAAF ZAHIR BATIN TO EVERYONE THAT I'VE DONE WRONG TO ESPECIALLY TO THOSE I BULLIED AND HURT AND HIT ON A DAILY BASIS.

XP

it was a fun day albeit the constant reminder in my head to run for my geography books...blah. :P

so this year i have 3 outfits for a change instead of the usual one baju kurung. : )

one purple baju kurung again. one turqoise baju kebaya ( did i spell that right? ;D ). one gray and white dress (though i can't really wear it to open houses at kuang or melawati, shows a bit.. :P).

woke up at 7 am in Melawati, which is surprisingly early since i've taken to waking up at 12 am lately. :p (notice that i'm over-using smileys? lol. :D) became makteh's apprentice since monday cause' apparently i'm lacking in kitchen skills. XP i admit it!!! i eww-ed at menyiang prawns and battled my way through the rempah wars with chicken. HAHA.

so spent the wee hours of the morning getting ready (wore my baju kurung), getting my lil' cute cousins ready (Arif, Naili and Arissa) and preparing the raya breakfast. :DD

after we went to the kubur to visit my late Tok Ki, we ( that is Inas and I ) decided to visit our old babysitter, Auntie Fauziah who lives across the road.

the house looks smaller than it used to. XP

spent a few hours catching up (and me trying to find a way to politely say "nice to have a chat but i gotta go") when suddenly I couldn't find Makteh anywhere. THAT BACKSTABBER! she left me and Inas at the house alone while she went home to send Maksu to the airport (Maksu had to do some work in Africa for MISC) lol. We came home and found out that Maksu already left and Tokwan and Makteh had came home from sending her so we hung out with Makju and clan. :P

Two visits from people and mountains of dirty dishes later, Abah came to pick us up to go to Kuang. :DD wanted to visit Sya's house but he said that we were in a hurry.

SORRY SYA! I MISS YOU TOO!!! :DD

SO, went to Kuang and RM209 later, me and my cousins played bunga api!!! and i was full from my fave dish during raya; lontong and rendang. @.@

lol.

anyway, hilman ( my cousin ) is grumbling in my ear to use the computer. gotta go!! :P

i'll upload some pictures later? :)

and SORRY again to people that i've done wrong to in the past.

keep moving forward. :P

duit raya count: RM209 (minus money from the parental units.) XP

go green with envy!!! mwahahahaha. :P

random quotes. try to figure it out.

2008-09-29T03:26:00.000-07:00

She’s just a typical teenager, angry, insecure, confused.
I wish I could tell her that it’s all going to pass,
but I don’t want to lie to her.

Everyone knows; the louder the music, the bigger the heartbreak.

I smile because when I cry, it doesn`t help. When I cry all it does is make people ask me if I’m okay. I would love nothing more than to punch these people in the face. I’m sitting here, crying, but yes, I’m perfectly happy. I mean, come on.
Give me a break. Obviously I`m not fine.

You just have to get through highschool. Cause highschool sucks for anyone who`s the least bit different. & then there`s college, & out in the real world you`ll find where you fit in.

He’s the reason I’m messed up,
the reason I can’t get myself into another relationship.
No matter how hard I try, no matter how bad I want to..
I’m scared. I’m not scared of getting hurt, I’m scared
of hurting someone else. Because I
could never care for anyone, the way I cared about him.

It’s not complicated at all;
I want him, He wants her.
Simple, right ?

We do not get unlimited chances to have
the things we want. And this, I know.
Nothing is worse than missing an oppurtunity
that could have changed your life.

It’s that kind of friendship you can’t
put into words, but it doesn’t matter because
you don’t need anyone else to understand.

i want to know if he likes me
but at the same time
i’m afraid of the answer

you really cant trust anyone in this world,
not your family, not your friends, not anyone.
because someday everyone will betray you.
Its just a matter of time.

haha. i love randomness.

letter meme?

2008-09-29T01:52:00.000-07:00

Dear arda,
I don't really know how to tell you this, but i dislike you. I think I realized it when I changed tennis shoes with George Bush and his wife and I saw you sit on my avocado plant. I'm sure you're frostbitten enough to understand that Santa doesn't exist. I'm returning the couch cushions to you, but I'll keep the results of your blood sample as a memory. You should also know that I will tell the authorities about eggplant fetishism.

In pain,
Jaf Reen Natassia Iman bt. Jaf Faizal

songs that make you scream and feel good at the same time.

2008-09-28T06:41:00.000-07:00

Yuna
-dan sebenarnya
-rocket
-deeper conversation
-polaroid cover

Anna Nalick
-shine
-more than melody
-citadel
-breathe
-wreck of the day

Mia Palencia
-chocolate
-superman
-sayang
-finding my way

Hilary Duff
-underneath this smile
-shine
-the getaway
-gypsy women
-dangerous to know
-little voice
-metamorphosis
-do you want me?
-fly
-wake up
-reach out
-where did i go right
-love just is
-the math
-anywhere but here
-party up

Lindsay Lohan
-confessions of a broken heart
-first
-symptoms of you
-speak
-disconnected
-i want you to want me

Paramore
-for a pessimist, i'm pretty optimistic
-misery business
-born for this
-that's what you get
-pressure
-brighter
-here we go again
-we are broken
-fences

Pink!
-so what
-who knew
-stupid girls
-god is a DJ
-get the party started
-family portrait
-u + ur hand
-just like a pill

Eyes Set To Kill
-reach
-darling

Fall Of Troy
-F.C.P remix

The Script
-fall for anything
-the man who can't be moved
-we cry

Damien Rice
-volcano
-the blower's daughter
-cannonball
-amie

Sara Bareilles
-love song
-fairytale
-bottle it up
-gravity

Jason Mraz
-i'm yours
-the dynamo of volition
-bella luna
-the remedy
-you and i both
-curbside prophet
-life is wonderful
-geek in the pink
-wordplay
-lucky
-please don't tell her

Michael Jackson
-you rock my world
-thriller
-beat it
-billie jean
-bad
-is it scary
-smooth criminal
-jam
-remember the time
-black or white
-scream
-ghosts

Evanescence
-lithium
-your star
-my immortal
-haunted
-tourniquet
-imaginary
-snow white queen
-the only one
-everybody's fool
-hello
-bring me to life
-like you
-lacrymosa
-all that i'm living for
-lose control

Flyleaf
-cassie

Aly&AJ
-like whoa
-rush
-do you believe in magic
-walking on sunshine
-potential breakup song
-chemicals react
-no one

Amerie
-1 thing
-take control

Kate Voegele
-only fooling myself
-this is life

Katy Perry
-i kissed a girl
-ur so gay
-thinking of you

Maroon 5
-hareder to breathe
-shiver
-she will be loved
-won't go home without you
-makes me wonder
-wake up call
-kiwi

Christina Aguilera
-infatuation
-fighter
-what a girl wants
-can't hold us down
-car wash

Michelle Branch
-all you wanted
-breathe
-are you happy now?
-the game of love

McFly
-five colours in her hair
-that girl
-i've got you
-star girl
-translyvannia
-the heart never lies

Hellogoodbye
-here in your arms
-oh it is love
-baby it's fact

Vanessa Carlton
-Ordinary Day
-1000 Miles
-Pretty Baby
-Nolita Fairytale
-white houses
-twilight

Ashley Tisdale
-headstrong
-suddenly
-he said, she said
-not like that
-kiss the girl

James Morrison
-you give me something

Marie Digby
-fool
-better off alone
-miss invisible
-girlfriend
-voice on the radio
-spell
-unfold
-paint me in your sunshine

Taylor Swift
-teardrops on my guitar
-our song
-picture to burn

Selena Gomez
-cruella de vil
-everything is not what it seems

Secondhand Serenade
-fall for you
-your call

Cheetah Girls
-fuego
-ala nanita nana
-i won't say i'm in love
-step up

Muse
-starlight
-time is running out
-super massive black hole

My Chemical Romance
-mama
-teenagers
-helena
-i'm not okay, i promise
-the ghost of you
-the end
-dead
-the sharpest lives
-disenchanted

Red Jumpsuit Apparatus
-face down
-false pretense

The Veronicas
-4ever
-everything i'm not
-when it all falls apart
-mouth shut
-leave me alone
-untouched
-hook me up
-this love

Avril Lavigne
-complicated
-i'm with you
-skater boy
-he wasn't
-my happy ending
-nobody's home
-runaway
-when you're gone
-the best damn thing
-innocence
-everything back but you
-one of those girls
-contagious

Jordin Sparks
-tattoo
-no air
-one step at a time

Regina Spektor
-felidity
-samson
-the call

Panic! At The Disco
-The Only Difference Between Martyrdom And Suicide Is Press Coverage
-i write sins not tragedies
-camisado
-lying is the most fun thing a girl can have without taking her clothes off
-but its better if you do
-build god then we'll talk
-There's A Good Reason These Tables Are Numbered Honey. You Just Haven't Thought Of It Yet
-nine in the afternoon
-that green gentlemen

Daft Punk
-digital love

Kat Deluna
-whine up

Daughtry
-home
-it's not over
-over you
-feels like tonight

Stereo Skyline
-heartbeat

Lily Allen
-smile
-alfie

Demi Lovato
-get back
-this is me
-what will i be
-that's how you know

Boys Like Girls
-hero heroine
-thunder
-the great escape

Jon MacLaughlin
-so close

Miley Cyrus
-7 things
-nobody's perfect
-i miss you
-one in a million
-who said
-i've got nerve
-rockstar
-true friend
-see you again

Vanessa Hudgens
-let's dance
-let go
-say ok
-never underestimate a girl
-whatever will be
-psychic
-lose your love
-too emotional
-sneakernight

Teddy Geiger
-these walls
-for you i will

Soundtracks
-across the universe
-shrek
-lotr

just a list of songs to remind me when i next buy my mp3. XD

any more new suggestions?

owh and..

SELAMAT HARI RAYA!!!! :DD

lovebug.

2008-09-26T16:24:00.000-07:00

this song is so cute! :DD

decisions, decisions, decisions.

2008-09-25T02:54:00.000-07:00

Asteria; the falling star. Astraea; the star maiden.

i have a lot to think of.

school and results.
my friends.
my family.
him.
the other.
future job?
mental stress.

and to top it off, i'm having daily headaches.

....bored,

2008-09-24T21:50:00.000-07:00

had the biggest headache this morning. cut school and now im at bob's cc.

malas.

high.

2008-09-23T02:03:00.000-07:00

you know, when you wanna get over someone and you set your mind and will to it, the person keeps haunting you.

its damn frustrating i tell you!

then you figure out that the person is meant to be in your mind and you let it be but feel guilty about thinking abt him.

i'm in a muddle.

and apparently the j and i in my name Jaf Reen Natassia Iman means....

J; i like to cry.

I; i am very happy.

how contradicting.

lol.

pmr in 19 days.

can't wait for it to be over.

PMR in 24 days (i think, XP)

2008-09-22T01:57:00.000-07:00

you know, i'm getting tired of this PMR crap.

i mean, after thousands of exercises later and my results are still disappointing, i've been thinking that the government or your stupid test results don't really shape your future. You do.

it's how you come back after each fall shapes who you are to be in 5 years, 10 years.

i've been trying to think through a positive light lately and i realise i have a lot to be grateful for even though i have a lot of problems on my shoulders.

but what the hell? you live for the good moments in life, not agonizing over every tiny imperfect second of it.

pmr is around the corner and i can't wait for it to be over.

i miss the beaches of Cherating where i spend my holidays as a stupid naive girl. the feel of the grainy sand on my feet. and the foam of the water just as they creep by the shoreline. and the sight of the beautiful sunset.

three things calm me down in this life.

the sight of a beautiful beach during twilight

my favourite songs in my ears (or my head)

and the people i love around me, without the fights and stress.

i long for those peaceful days in midst of this controlled chaos.

:)

changes.

2008-09-19T06:38:00.000-07:00

i had to do it.

i had to change.

it wasn't that i wanted to. it was my most hated and unexpected metamorphosis.

i realised it after the big fight we had at tuition where all of us (me, tiara, naz, din, megat, alysha) confessed all the backstabbing and rumours.

i noticed that i changed. i finally became someone that was sick and damn tired of all the lies.
i started to build a huge strong wall to keep it all inside and just keep on smiling and laughing.

i guess i was too busy pretending that i end up ignoring my friends and getting moodswings all the time.

maybe the need of the situation forced me to reaccess myself and suddenly, i find myself to be this stupid, ignorant, selfish brat.

i hate it.

i think back when i was in form one, naive and innocent not knowing a thing about the social life, getting straight A's, making my parents proud. i wore what i want and didn't care about they rumour mills.

then now, my results are crumbling, i have to go by these stupid rules, my innocent eyes are stripped lil by lil, my life was in pieces and i thought about where i stand with my friends.

was i a burden or something..?

ok, i had problems before, HUGE problems but suddenly they all united and hit me in the head with the force. and i changed.

its no biggie to everyone. everyone changes when they get to a point. but i hate it.

i don't really know what to do. just felt that i had to let it out of my chest.

sorry for the pessimism guys.

2 years more. 2 years more.

2008-09-19T01:24:00.000-07:00

One of the worst things of procrastination is the vague feeling it gives you. At the back of your mind you know there's a ton of things that needs to be done, but you just can't put your finger on all of them. This makes you even more adverse to starting on doing them. Vagueness is also the cause of panic and fear of knowing you haven't been doing anything and you don't know how to go on from there because there's just too much to be done. It's never too much. Don't let the fear and panic get to you. Face it. Plan it. Take the consequences seriously and just start doing it.

-taken by hafidzi91.blogspot.com.

i agree with this dude. found his blog from aisyah, she said he's one of the most philosophical (did i spell that right?) guys she knew. lol. i guess they had some history.

twilight trailer #2

2008-09-15T07:55:00.000-07:00

two words ; fucking anxiety!

2008-09-12T21:22:00.001-07:00

Jean Hamilton: Give us a word with tic in it.
Holly Hamilton: Fine, tragic.
Jean Hamilton: Fantastic.
Holly Hamilton: Pathetic. Ecstatic.
Jean Hamilton: Thank you.
Holly Hamilton: Sarcastic.
Jean Hamilton: Psychotic.
Holly Hamilton: It's genetic.

the perfect example of a mother-daughter fight on the way to find the perfect man.

i liked that movie. The Perfect Man i mean. don't you?

32 days.

2008-09-11T08:04:00.000-07:00

32FREAKINGDAYSTOTHEDAMN
PENILAIANMENENGAHRENDAH.

OK, i'm freaking out.

yes. that's right.

and my average (or the highest i ever scored) is only 5A's.

WHAT THE F?

i need to get 7! AHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

AND it doesn't help that i'm in a freaking stupid bad mood.

warning; stay away from jaf reen natassia iman.

2008-09-10T08:04:00.000-07:00

ITULAH MANUSIA.

they stay with you then leave you behind to pick up the pieces or cry alone in the dark.

they say one thing but mean the other.

they ask you for help and bolt at the sight of you asking for some in return.

they let you crumble to pieces instead of gluing you back together.

they stab you in the back when you least expect it.

they are there when you're laughing but not when you're crying.

i don't know what else to do.

those moments

2008-09-08T02:57:00.000-07:00

you know when you get those moments,
when you just wanna runaway and start over new?
even though you know running won't do you much good,
and the past will creep like a shadow after your very steps.

those moments when you blast your speakers to the highest volume,
and your mother comes screaming into the room,
those moments when you suddenly find you had a knife in your hands-
poised dangerously close to your wrists,

those moments when you feel like-
your world is tumbling down in your ears,
crashing in your eyes,
demolished before your very eyes,
and the smell of burning fire in your nose.

these are the moments when your will and inner strength are tested,
sometimes even beyond your limits,
when some people shine beyond their own comprehension,
others fall beneath the ground.

some of these moments will cause you to lose everything,
but there are some instances,
when you realize that you had everything right under your nose,
and you start to treasure your friends and loved ones.

these are those moments i'm going through,
those moments of self-doubt or self-courage,
i guess i'll find out huh?

loved + sucked

2008-09-05T05:28:00.000-07:00

you know how you get two sides of a thing on ONE day. and its damn frustrating.

spent the morning; taking exams (science and kemahiran hidup) and cramming my head with notes.

spent the afternoon; at awin's house till 2.30. was interesting, she couldn't tell her mom that she's dating sherry/syazreen so i had to cloud a lot of things when her mom asked me about awin's attitude at school, how's her studies, how's my studies and.. zzz. haha. can't help it!

i was totally wiped! XP spent a good 45 minutes during kh exams taking forty winks. lol. after solat jumaat, awin's dad sent me and mimi (megat if you will) to school where hanif, aqib and nabil was waiting for us. they even brought speakers can you believe it? haha.

sat with hanif while reading lord of the rings (unabridged rocks!) and watching megat, nabil and aqib dancing ala-Moose. lol. at 3 something, Ilman showed up. then they started dancing to mj. haha. it was fun and funny if you look past the obscene moves. Haha!

the main reason why i stayed back after school was that things at home was getting really stressful and i really didn't wanna stay in that hellhole.

i'm still trying to block the screams.

and i wanted to see hanif obviously. ; )
aww...he's so sweet!
can you believe that he bought a damn ring for me! not ciplak k? with engravings also!

'love goes by destiny'

we walked to pcp (puteri central park) where we would wait for megat and alif, who wanted to try and teach me how to play the guitar (unsuccessfully, i might add. XP) when he suddenly asked me to choose between his right and left hand.

"Kanan!"
"Takde! haha. pilih lagi!"
"Kanan!"
"Takde!"
(i was getting annoyed. haha)
":P"
"cube you tutup mate."
(squinted my eyes, tried to see...rabun! shit.)
(he put the necklace with the ring over my head)
"omg. serious ke nie?"
"yea la. pakai always auw!"
(i was so damn speechless here)

love you, boo.

haha. forgive the whole jiwang2 part. lol. it was raining all afternoon.

normally i would love it but i had LORD OF THE RINGS in my hands! i can't get it wet!

spent the evening up until now; went to bed half-asleep with meiko - boys with girlfriends playing on my phone. woke up just 10 minutes before buka puasa. spent the rest of the evening
sitting through screams.

WAS TOTALLY REALLY OUT OF THIS WORLD BORED.

2008-09-03T07:51:00.000-07:00

Rules:
1. Tag 10 people (not the one who sent it to you!)
2. Answer truthfully
3. Take it in public!
4. Tell all tagged on their profile that they have been tagged.
---------------------------------------------
Info
[x] I am shorter than 5'4.
[x] I think I'm ugly sometimes.
[x] I have many scars.
[x] I tan easily.
[x] I wish my hair was a different color.
[ ] I have friends who have never seen my natural hair color.
[ ] I have a tattoo.
[x] I am self-conscious about my appearance.
[ ] I have/I've had braces.
[x] I wear glasses.
[ ] I would get plastic surgery if it were 100% safe, free of cost, and scar-free
[x] I've been told I'm attractive by a complete stranger.
[ ]I have more than 2 piercing.
[ ] I have piercing in places besides my ears.
[ ] I have freckles.

Family/Home Life
[x] I've sworn at my parents.
[x] I've run away from home.
[x] I've been kicked out of the house.
[ ]My biological parents are together.
[x] I have a sibling less than one year old.
[x] I want to have kids someday.
[ ] I've lost a child.

School/Work
[x] I'm in school
[x] I have a job
[x] I've fallen asleep at work/school.
[ ] I almost always do my homework.
[x] I've missed a week or more of school.
[x] I've been on the Honor Roll within the last 2 years.
[ ] I failed more than 1 class last year
[]I've stolen something from my job
[ ] I've been fired

Embarrassment
[x] I've slipped out an "lol" in a spoken conversation.
[ ] Disney movies still make me cry.
[ ] I've peed from laughing.
[x] I've snorted while laughing.
[x] I've laughed so hard I've cried.
[x] I've glued my hand to something.
[ ] I've had my pants rip in public.

Health
[x] I was born with a disease/impairment
[ ] I've gotten stitches/staples.
[ ] I've broken a bone
[ ] I've had my tonsils removed.
[x] I've sat in a doctor's office/emergency room with a friend.
[ ] I've had my wisdom teeth removed.
[ ] I had a serious surgery.
[x]I've had chicken pox.
[ ] I've had measles

Traveling
[x] I've driven over 200 miles in one day.
[x] I've been on a plane.
[ ] I've been to Canada.
[ ] I've been to Mexico.
[ ] I've been to Niagara Falls.
[ ] I've been to Japan.
[ ] I've celebrated Mardi Gras in New Orleans.
[ ] I've been to Europe.
[ ] I've been to Africa.

Experiences
[x] I've gotten lost in my city.
[x] I've seen a shooting star.
[x] I've wished on a shooting star
[ ] I've seen a meteor shower.
[x] I've gone out in public in my pajamas.
[x] I've pushed all the buttons on an elevator.
[x] I've kicked a guy where it hurts.
[ ] I've been to a casino.
[ ] I've been skydiving.
[ ] I've gone skinny dipping.
[x] I've played spin the bottle.
[x] I've drank a whole gallon of milk in one hour.
[ ] I've crashed a car.
[ ] I've been Skiing.
[x] I've been in a play.
[ ] I've met someone in person from myspace.
[ ] I've caught a snowflake on my tongue.
[ ] I've seen the Northern lights.
[x] I've sat on a roof top at night.
[ ] I've played chicken.
[x] I've played a prank on someone.
[x] I've ridden in a taxi.
[ ] I've seen the Rocky Horror Picture Show.
[x] I've eaten sushi.
[ ] I've been snowboarding.

Relationships
[ ]I'm single
[x] I'm in a relationship
[ ] I'm engaged.
[ ] I've gone on a blind date.
[ ] I've been the dumped more than the dumper.
[x] I miss someone right now.
[x] I have a fear of abandonment.
[ ] I've gotten divorced.
[x] I've had feelings for someone who didn't have them back.
[x] I've told someone I loved them when I didn't.
[x] I've told someone I didn't love them when I did.
[ ] I've kept something from a past relationship.
[ ] I've had a crush on someone of the same sex.
[ ]I've had a crush on a teacher.
[x] I am a cuddler.
[ ] I've been kissed in the rain.
[x] I've hugged a stranger.
[ ] I have kissed a stranger.

Honesty/Crime
[x] I've done something I promised someone else I wouldn't.
[x] I've done something I promised myself I wouldn't.
[x] I've snuck out of my house.
[x] I have lied to my parents about where I am.
[x] I am keeping a secret from the world.
[x] I've cheated while playing a game.
[x] I've cheated on a test.
[ ] I've run a red light.
[ ] I've been suspended from school.
[x] I've witnessed a crime.
[x] I've been in a fist fight.
[ ] I've been arrested.

Drugs/Alcohol
[ ]I've consumed alcohol.
[ ] I regularly drink.
[ ] I've passed out from drinking.
[ ] I have passed out drunk at least once in the past 6 months.
[ ] I've smoked weed.
[ ] I've taken painkillers when I didn't need them.
[ ] I've eaten shrooms.
[ ] I've popped E.
[ ] I've inhaled Nitrous.
[ ] I've done hard drugs.
[ ] I have cough drops when I'm not sick.
[x] I can't swallow pills.
[ ] I can swallow about 5 pills at a time no problem.
[ ] I have been diagnosed with clinical depression.
[ ] I have been diagnosed with one or more anxiety disorder.
[x] I shut others out when I'm depressed.
[ ] I take anti-depressants.
[ ] I'm anorexic or bulimic.
[x] I've slept an entire day when I didn't need it.
[x]I've hurt myslef on purpose.
[x] I've woken up crying.

Death and Suicide
[x] I'm afraid of dying.
[x] I hate funerals.
[x] I've seen someone dying.
[x] Someone close to me has attempted suicide.
[ ] Someone close to me has committed suicide.
[x] I've planned my own suicide.
[x] I've attempted suicide.
[ ]I've written an eulogy for myself.

Materialism
[ ] I own over 5 rap CDs.
[ ] I own an iPod or MP3 player.
[ ]I have an unhealthy obsession with anime/manga.
[ ] I own multiple designer purses, costing over $100 a piece.
[ ] I own something from Hot Topic.
[ ] I own something from Pac Sun.
[ ]I collect comic books.
[ ] I own something from The Gap.
[ ] I own something I got on e-bay.
[ ] I own something from Abercrombie.

Random
[x] I can sing well. (i think.)
[ ] I've stolen a tray from a fast food restaurant.
[x] I open up to others easily.

[x]You ask me a question I'm most likely going to answer it
[x]I watch the news.
[ ]I don't kill bugs.
[x] I hate hearing songs that sacrifice meaning for the sake of being able to rhyme.
[x] I curse regularly.
[x] I sing in the shower.
[ ] I am a morning person.
[ ] I paid for my cell phone ring tone.
[x]i"m a snob about grammar.
[ ] I am a sports fanatic.
[x]I twirl my hair.
[ ] I have "x"s in my screen name.
[ ] I love being neat.
[ ] I love Spam
[ ] I've copied more than 30 CD's in a day
[ ] I bake well.
[x My favorite color is either white, yellow, pink, red or blue
[ ] I've worn pajamas to school.
[ ] I like Martha Stewart.
[ I know how to shoot a gun
[x] I am in love with love.
[ ] I am guilty of tYpInG lIkE tHiS.
[x] I laugh at my own jokes.
[ ] I eat fast food weekly.
[x] I believe in ghosts.
[ ] I am online 24/7, even as an away message.
[ ] I've not turned anything in and still got an A in a certain class.
[ ] I can't sleep if there is a spider in the room.
[x] I am really ticklish.
[ ] I love white chocolate
[x] I bite my nails.
[ ] I play video games.
[ ] I'm good at remembering names.
[ ] I'm good at remembering dates.
[x] I have no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life.
[x] All of those are answered honestly

40+ days to fucking PMR

2008-08-29T20:25:00.000-07:00

won't update in a while. busy studying.

the guy.

2008-08-29T09:59:00.000-07:00

you with the pencil and sketchbook in hand,

did i ever say,

you are one of kind,

the guy with a smile to brighten my day,

with the words that melt me to pieces,

the guy who i could talk to about everything under the sun,

about politics, myths, stories and the moon and stars,

i wish one day,

you could see me as me,

and call me e'toile or my dear like -

the sweet, stupid messages you send each week,

just take me into your world,

of sunshine and smiles,

i wait for the three words from your lips,

meant for your future with me,

too bad it was never meant to be,

and you won't ever see me.

lol. old poem for that old stupid one-sided crush.

enjoying the holiday buzz...NOT!

2008-08-19T23:38:00.000-07:00

dang! i need to start controlling my hormones and focus that load of wasteful energy to doing what i'm supposed to be doing for the last 6 months.

STUDYING.

ah well. :P

I MISS YOU GUYS LIKE CRAZY!

the tuesday sillies:
syawalina.
karin.
farah.
steffie.
hk.
josephine.
arda. (even though i don't know you that well)
aisya.

r.a.g.e
azreen
alysha
tiara

btp guys&gals
mimi.
khalis.
aqib.
nabil.
dzaki.
milo.
naz.
balqis.
awin.
syamil.
syauqi.
halim.
damia.
farah.
amirah
farah ayuni.
afiah.
the rest of 3arif.
and the rest of the school's gangs.
and him of course.

lol.

newayz, got tagged again by miss NUR syawalina azwani (i totally forgot the Nur before, sorry dear!)

Answer the questions below, do a Google Image search with your answer, take a picture from the first page of results, and do it with minimal words of explanation. Tag 5 other people to do the same once you’ve finished answering every question.

1. The age you’ll be on your next birthday:

2. A place you'd like to travel to :

city of love. plus, i wanna see the louvre!
and did i mention that he and i wanna go there too?
i did? ok. ;p

OR

new zealand. omg, look at that.
i just melt. : )

3. Your favourite place

its like a cross between my bed and the bookstore. haha.

4. Your favourite food :

"ABAH! LET'S GO TO CHILI'S!"

it make my mouth water.
Chili's Molten Chocolate Cake.

5. Your favourite pet :

haha.

i typed in crookshanks cause that's my sister's cat name.
but trust me, crookshanks doesn't look anything like this.

he has gray and white striped fur and a crooked tail. :P

6. Your favorite color combination:

7. Your favourite piece of clothing:

i love slogan tees. they're straight to the point.

8. Your all-time favourite song:

9. Your favourite TV show:

10. First name of your significant other/crush:

this is really a sign for me to control my hormones.
my significant other's NAME came up in jawi on google image. :P
for those who can't read jawi, it means 'hanif'.

11. The town you live in:

can't wait to get out of this place.

12. Your first job:

graphic designer.

13. Your dream job:

actress.

bestselling author.

astronomer.

pianist/singer.

i'm a girl with many ambitions.
easier said. i want adventure.

14. A bad habit you have:

i'm selfish, have a tendency of losing friends and i bite my nails.
i hate myself.

15. Your worst fear:

16. The one thing you'd like to do before you die:

go on an adventure that is out of this world.

People I tag :

anyone.

dang that was tiring.

and it put me in a depressive mode.

laters guys.

BRITAIN'S GOT TALENT!

2008-08-17T07:55:00.000-07:00

OMG. this guy has the CUTEST SMILE (the one that makes you melt in your seats), THE GREATEST MOVES EVER (since michael jackson i dare say) and THE....OMG, BEST ATTITUDE EVER. he won through sheer determination.

its hard not to love him.
congrats george. you deserve to win.

audition.

semi-finals.

finals.

15th August 2008

2008-08-16T01:46:00.000-07:00

well, friday was fun.

haha. kinda full of laughs la. we finished our trials on thursday so we, meaning me, sha, tiara, kamal, and naz, decided to skip school and go to the curve for a movie.

when i woke up in the morn', i was.... LATE!

GOD. immediately woke up, took my clothes and my towel, rushed into the bathroom while arranging for Nda ( Tiara's mom ) to pick me up in 15 minutes. thank god i didn't bring my hp into the shower, which is the kind of thing i could have done. XP

newayz, decided to be a bit girly for a change (I BLAME NAZLIANA FOR THIS!). wore a black tanktop and short black skirt. can you believe that the moment we found a toilet that was open (it was 9 am, everything was closed) Naz immediately opened up a 'make up counter' and changed me into what i think is the female version of the JOKER.

you know, the one in the dark knight which is coincidentally the movie we watched after i, the big baby, didn't wanna watch Susuk.

Sorry guys! But i really don't wanna watch movies that were created to make people pee. in their seats.

lol. owh! forgot to say....mimi, inas and azreen decided to tag along and came later with alysha's mom. after the movie which was about 3 pm? we decided to tour the Curve.

didn't noticed the blisters till i came home. lol.

kamal nearly got busted with his parents (he came without their permission) but i think he got home alright.

i know, i know. my attitude gets worse from year to year. (sorry farah! i'm not a miss goody-two-shoes my mom thinks i am!)

XD

newayz, bought a knee length skirt for RM20, a tee/cover up for RM5, sandals for RM7 and a diary for RM14.

i know. i'm such a cheapskate. i only buy things below rm30! Abah! You're rubbing off on me! ;p

and i totally missed hanif all the while, what with T and Kamal making out and holding hands and touching eachother 24/7.

actually they remind me of Ron and Lavender in their 6th year if you get my drift.

lol. gtg anyway! gotta pack my bags for next week. after going to sunway, i'm staying over at my abah's till wednesday and at melawati till friday.

bliss from the house for a week. ahh.

: )

my boo.

2008-08-13T08:55:00.000-07:00

my boo - usher and alicia keys.

ignore the annoying video in the beginning. XP

stressed.

2008-08-13T08:11:00.000-07:00

on top of the frustrating trials, my blog had to give me problems too.

so, i won't be using www.canon-harrypotter.blogspot.com due to the fact that i can't log into my account.

-.-"

anyway, not much of a post. will update later.

TOMORROW IS THE LAST DAY OF TRIALS!
thank god.

....

2008-08-13T00:06:00.001-07:00

testing.